


On the Run

by chantiemaya



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: AU, Angst, Crime Fighting, Drug Dealing, F/F, FBI, Lesbian, Lesbian AU, Lesbian Sex, Love, Mentions of Violence, Pining, Romance, Running Away, Strong Female Characters, Texas, Trauma, cis women, closeted lesbian, country cover band, country singer, junkie, lesbian singer, nypd, russian hooker, so many spoilers in the tags, trixya - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-03-24 08:15:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13807194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chantiemaya/pseuds/chantiemaya
Summary: Two women meet by chance, one working hard to build a career for herself, the other running from her life. They instantly connect, although not for long.Romance / Crime**WARNING**Some sensitive topics later on: mentions of abuse, not graphicSomeone has a panic attack and faints in a later chapter





	1. DALLAS

**Author's Note:**

> This story was inspired by the song 'Party of one' by Brandi Carlile. I also used the song 'Girl next door' by Brandy Clark.
> 
> I wanted to write a oneshot about our favorite biological women when they meet in a bar and have a hot one night stand, but my imagination ran wild with Katya's back story. The crime aspect of it is new for me, I hope it's good...
> 
> Thx Pinky for helping me out XO
> 
> *DISCLAIMER*  
> This is a work of fiction using characters created by others. I do not own these characters, nor did I get official consent from their owners. The only intent of this work is to entertain readers, not to get any type of financial gain. The acts in this story aren’t necessarily condoned by their creators or by me. Read with caution and read the tags.

_April_

Katya wakes with a shock when a voice starts talking to her over the music she's listening to. One earbud falls out of her ear when she moves her head, and she realized it's the flight attendant telling her to put her chair in the upright position because they are getting ready to land.

It's dark outside, and Katya doesn't have a window seat, but staring past the guy that does, she sees the bright lights of Love Field Airport. She's in Dallas, Texas, and she has no idea why.

It was the first flight that left the airport in New York City, and it seemed far enough. She didn't have the patience to wait for a flight to a place that was further away, and she wasn't on the right airport for something international. All Katya wanted was to leave New York City, as soon as possible, and it didn't matter where to. As long as it was far away.

Dallas is balmy, a comfortable temperature with a nice breeze. Katya walks out of the front entrance of the airport and finds a bus stop for the city express. While waiting for her luggage, she found a cheap place to stay and kind of knows where to go. The motel is only one street away from the bus stop, which is good, because Katya is exhausted and has a very heavy weekend bag over her shoulder.

She signs in at the desk, gets her key and finds her room, falls down on the bed and sighs deeply. The tears come, finally, she's allowing them to run over her face, which is pressed into the old, flowery patterned bedsheets, run over her nose and drip down onto the sheet.

When she slowly calms down, Katya gets up from the bed and puts a light on in the small room. It's old-fashioned but clean. She likes that it's small and she likes that the windows have a layer of misty adhesive plastic over them. She feels like no one can see her, and that makes her feel protected. She also likes that the receptionist had no issue with accepting cash up front and didn't blink an eye at her fake driver's license. She can stay here for a while, at least a few days.

Katya uses her time mostly to browse the news online on her laptop and watch movies on the pay per view channel. She only goes out in the early morning, in a baseball cap and sunglasses over tied up brown hair, exposing the shaved sides of her head. She jogs around the neighborhood while the sun comes up and people are on their way to work. She stretches in a park and does push-ups, lunges and squats, but saves the sit-ups for when she's back in her hotel room. She shops for groceries in the small 7/11 after she's showered and dressed in comfortable, baggy clothes, wearing glasses, her baseball cap and no makeup.

After five days of being holed up in the hotel room, Katya gets restless. The newspapers haven't written anything about her, which could be good, but also bad, and the cosy room seems to be closing in on her. She takes a walk outside once it's dark, and walks past the little country bar that she's passed every morning on her jog. Now it's open and busy, even though it's a week day, and people seem to be enjoying themselves.

Katya walks into the bar, pulling the baseball cap lower over her eyes. She knows she looks very different, but she can't let go of the paranoia - not yet.

There bar is bigger than it looks from the outside and they have a band playing live. Most of the patrons are sitting at small, round tables scattered throughout and watch the band. It's a group of four guys and a girl, and they play country music. Katya isn't very well versed into pop culture, but she recognizes some of the classics the band plays - things like Dolly Parton and Shania Twain. The singer is dressed in pink from head to toe, and all the guys are donning at least one pink item - one has a pink hat, another a pink tie.

She's pretty, the singer, with her big blonde curls - Katya wonders if they're real - and her perfectly applied makeup. She announces they're taking a break, and their audience cheers. Katya sits at the side of the bar, in the farthest corner of this place, and she feels herself smile at the enthusiasm of the singer. She looks so happy and joyful and it's infectious.

The band members all take to the bar and enjoy a drink, talking and laughing, and taking pictures with some of the patrons that come up to them. People offer them their seats at the bar, and the band huddles together at the corner, close to Katya. The female singer is even prettier up close, and Katya is surprised to see that her eyes are brown, even though her hair is very blonde and looks all natural. Katya orders another soda, and she hopes the bartender isn't fed up with her not spending more money. When he brings her the drink, she beckons him closer.

"Can I order them a big plate of those snacks?" She points at the band and the big plates that are going around the tables.

"Sure thing," the bartender says with a smile, and orders his coworker to fix a plate. It's a good assortment of fried snacks, cheese and pretzels, and the band receives it with loud cheering. The bartender points at Katya and that's when she realises her mistake. A furious blush creeps up her cheeks and she tries to hide behind her cap, but all the band members are now turning to her.

"Thank you, this is great," says the guy in the pink hat as he pops a piece of fried chicken into his mouth.

"That was so nice, thank you!" The girl now fully turns to Katya, and Katya smiles and shrugs.

"You guys are great," Katya says softly, but the singer hears her and her smile is dazzling.

"Have you come to see us before? I don't think I've ever seen you here."

There's a little bit of an accent to her voice, but not typically Texan or even Southern. It's cute, and Katya watches her eat and knock back a beer.

"Nah, just passing through."

Katya turns back to her drink, hoping that's the end of it.

"I like your hair," the girl says with a wink. Katya fingers the stubbly side shave self consciously.

"Oh, really? I did it myself, it's probably a little sloppy."

"No! You did a great job! I wish I could wear my hair like that, but it doesn't look good on me."

The girl is easily making conversation like it's nothing, and Katya wants to disappear into the wall she's leaning against. She should just go, but she can't take her eyes off of the beauty beside her, and then the girl giggles, scrunching up her nose and shaking her head.

"I think every lesbian goes through the side shave phase. Some can pull it off, some can't."

She winks again, and then hops off her chair and stands close to Katya for a moment, putting a hand on her arm.

  
"I gotta go back," she points over her shoulder with her thumb. "Will you still be here when I finish?"

Katya's mouth is open, but she can't speak, and the warm brown eyes in the middle of the black eyeliner and big fake lashes turn to pleading. She squeezes Katya's arm and Katya feels warm.

"Please?"

"Ok."

Katya watches the band go back to the stage with a lot of cheers from the audience, and they get right into the next song. Katya doesn't know exactly what just happened, but she's pretty sure that girl just flirted with her, and assumed Katya is a lesbian.

Katya really wants a drink and a cigarette, especially when she smells the tobacco on the bartender when he comes back from a quick break, but she won't do it. She has to stay on her schedule and not stray, she needs to be clean and healthy and keep herself on track. The only things she permits herself now and then are pasta and chocolate. And maybe some flirting with a gorgeous country singer.

Trixie keeps looking over to the side of the bar while she's on stage, she can't help it. Every time there's one cute lesbian in their home bar, Trixie zeroes in on them like they're wearing a homing device. She was very shy, but her eyes under that cap were the brightest blue Trixie has ever seen, and she kinda wants to know what's hiding behind that distant attitude and the light accent. It's been way too long since Trixie picked up a girl, and even though she told herself she's going to look for someone a little more serious, and do the dating thing for real, she's not sure if she can stay away from this one. She was ready to get her a little drunk, but Jim told her she was drinking soda all evening.

When it's time for Trixie's solo moment, she picks up her guitar and stands at the edge of the stage, pointedly looking at the woman with the baseball cap.

"This one is for all the pretty girls," Trixie says in the microphone, her voice low, and the women at the tables cheer her on. But she's looking at the brunette in the back, who seems to sink further away into her corner.

Trixie proceeds to play and sing 'Girl Next Door' by Brandy Clark, which really just mocks pretty girls, and the audience eats it up. She follows it up with 'Jolene' by Dolly Parton. Afterwards the band joins her again for one last song.

Katya shifts on her bar stool when the performance is over and the bartender turns the stereo back on. The band members leave the stage and disappear through a side door, and Katya is unsure if she should still wait. The girl asked her to wait, but is she leaving now? She takes a moment to look around the bar, and decides she's pretty good where she is. It's late, some people are leaving, others are ordering another round like they don't have to work tomorrow.

Not fifteen minutes later, the singer is back. She's changed her outfit, now wearing jeans and a T-shirt from what looks like her own merchandise. Katya is shocked at her face being completely bare - no fake lashes, no eyeliner, her skin dewy from her moisturizer. She looks a few years younger and even more beautiful. They faded, ripped skinny jeans make her legs look super long, and she's paired it with brown cowboy boots for some extra country vibes.

"Hey. Just had to change, thanks for staying," the girl says in her subtle accent as she pulls a stool close to Katya and sits down. She orders a beer for herself, and offers Katya another of whatever she's having. Then she holds out a hand.

"Trixie."

"Kate."

It comes out a little strange, because that's not her name, but Trixie doesn't know that.

"Is that from Beatrice?" Katya asks, proud that she's able to form words and act normal. The girl's eyes light up.

"Yes! How did you guess?"

"I knew a Beatrice, she went by Trix."

The girl smiles sweetly and takes a swig of her beer.

"You don't want something stronger?" Trixie points at Katya's sparkly water, and Katya shakes her head.

"So, you're new here?"

Katya chuckles. "Sort of yeah. Just passing through. I walked by, it looked like fun in here, so..."

"It's always fun here. This is our home bar, we play here every week, sometimes more."

"It was a great performance. Were all the songs covers, or do you have original work as well? I don't know that many country artists, I'm afraid."

They talk for a while about the band, how they are a real cover band, but Trixie writes her own stuff as well and performs solo sometimes. Conversation flows easily, and Katya is very comfortable as long as the conversation is about Trixie. Trixie wants to know things about Katya though, and she has to come up with some things on the spot - her age, where she's from, why she is in Dallas.

After a few beers and waters, Trixie is getting much closer to Katya and even touches her hand while they talk. Katya suddenly regrets not taking care of her nails after she clumsily removed her acrylics on her first day here. But Trixie's hand is so soft and warm, rubbing Katya's knuckles so sweetly, that she doesn't dwell on it.

The bar closes at three a.m., and Katya is shocked to know that that's the time. Trixie's band members have left a while ago, and when they are on the sidewalk together, Trixie takes her hand again.

"So, Kate. I really like you." Trixie smiles her bright smile, lacing her fingers through Katya's.

Trixie knows her smile is a powerful weapon, especially since she's had her teeth fixed, and she pulls out all the stops. She wants to take this girl home.

Katya smiles shyly and looks down at the street.

"I like you too," she says to her feet.

"Yeah?"

Trixie closes in, her body lined up with Katya. They're almost the same height, Trixie is maybe an inch taller in her boots compared to Katya's sneakers. Trixie hooks her finger under Katya's chin and pulls it up, and with her other hand turns her cap backward on her head, and then she's pressing her lips to Katya's gently. She moves slow, a lot slower than she really wants to, to give the other girl an opportunity to back out, but she doesn't. She kisses her back and Trixie's body fills with excitement.

Trixie's hand grabs at Katya's big sweater and she looks right into her eyes.

"Wanna come home with me?"

Katya bites her bottom lip and it makes Trixie's body melt into her even more, and then she nods, and Trixie nods, and they're walking, hand in hand, in the opposite direction of Katya's motel.

"I live close, we can walk," Trixie says.

"Ok."

They walk through the dark night, the streets mostly deserted, and keep glancing at each other and giggling. Trixie stops in front of an old apartment building that looks like it's been renovated. Inside it's pretty modern, and the elevator swiftly brings them to the top floor, while Trixie puts her hands in the front pocket of Katya's hoodie and kisses her again.

The apartment looks cosy, but Trixie doesn't put on any lights and passes by the couch. She pulls a blushing, giggling Katya right to her bedroom.

"This ok?" Trixie asks, when they stand in the small bedroom with just a small light on.

"Yeah."

"You nervous?"  
  


"A little," Katya says with a shrug. "You're so pretty."

Trixie smiles and kisses her, and while their lips are locked, she takes off Katya's cap and tosses it to the floor. Her hands get greedy and wriggle to get under that oversized hoodie. Katya's waist is a lot smaller than her clothes make her look, and Trixie softly moans at the feeling of her bare skin at the waistband of her tracksuit bottoms.

"Take this off, baby," Trixie whispers, her accent a little stronger on that last words. Katya takes the sweater over her head, revealing a simple blue sports bra underneath.

"Fuck," Trixie breathes, her warm, soft hands on Katya's abs. "You're fucking ripped."

Katya can't speak, she's drunk on this girl, her kisses, her smile, those soft brown eyes that follow every move she makes. Katya finally makes a move and pushes Trixie backwards to the bed.

"Wait, let me..." Trixie steps back and quickly takes off her boots, her legs a little wobbly, and then opens her jeans and pushes them down her legs. Katya's stare follows her as she opens the duvet on her bed and shuffles right to the middle of it, then pats the bed and winks again, making Katya laugh.

Katya toes off her sneakers, takes off her socks and her pants, and then she looks at Trixie intently while pulling the bra over her head.

"Kate, what the hell, are you a professional athlete?" Trixie stares at Katya's body as she slides onto the bed with her.

"I just like working out," Katya says softly, running a hand over Trixie's hip.

They have very different body types, Katya's athletic and toned, her skin pale, Trixie's more full, her skin tan and soft, her toenails painted dark red.

"What happened here?" Trixie's gentle fingers ghost over the large, brown bruise on Katya's ribs.

"I was in an accident, look," Katya turns to her stomach and shows Trixie her back and the backs of her legs. There are bruises of different sizes and in different stages of healing, and then there's the cut on her side, which has fresh stitches in it.

"Oh geez! But... are you ok? Can you... I mean..."

"I'm fine," Katya says with a chuckle as she turns back to her side. "I can, definitely."

Trixie grins and rolls on top of her, kissing her and covering her with her body. Katya gasps at how good she feels, she's all soft curves, she smells amazing, her movements are sexy and gentle. Katya's mind is spinning. She pulls at Trixie's shirt until it's over her head, then immediately grabs at her breasts in a lacy pink bra.

"Pink is your color, huh?"

Trixie giggles. "Yeah, I like girly things. And girls."

They both laugh.

"Is your pussy this color?" Katya asks, fingering the lines of the lace on Trixie's skin. Trixie laughs breathily and kisses Katya's neck.

"You wanna find out?" Trixie whispers against Katya's ear.

"Yes, ma'am," Katya answers. Her hands travel down over Trixie's skin, and she feels goosebumps on the backs of her thighs. She pulls at her cute, cotton bikini cut and sighs when her hands are filled with all that soft flesh underneath.

"Lay down, let me taste you," Katya whispers, and Trixie needs no further encouragement. She flops to her back and takes off her bra. Katya grabs a breast, a little roughly, watching Trixie's face for her reaction. Trixie's mouth is open and she stares at Katya. Katya keeps her stare as she swipes her tongue over Trixie's nipple, then again, and then sucks it between her lips. Trixie's eyelids flutter, but she tries to keep Katya's gaze.

Katya's other hand slides down over Trixie's stomach and meets a trimmed strip of hair, then further down, Trixie parts her legs to let Katya feel her soft, swollen pussy. She's warm and sticky and Katya easily slides her fingers through her lips, making her moan. The sound heats up all of Katya's body.

"So beautiful," Katya sighs against Trixie's breast. Trixie's eyes are now closed, and she throws her head back.

Katya gives the other breasts the same treatment as the first one, she would feel sad if it was left out, and Trixie starts to roll her hips into her hand.

"Ah, fuck," Trixie pants a little as Katya's finger slips lower and teases her entrance.

"What do you like, sweetheart. Tell me," Katya whispers, her mouth between Trixie's boobs now.

"You. I like you. Just... fuck me."

Katya's mouth is curled in a smile as she kisses Trixie's side, her belly, the side of her hip. She's no longer shy, she's drunk on this girl, and she's gonna take what she wants. She can worry about her life again tomorrow, and every day after that.

"Oh yes, yes, please," Trixie mumbles as Katya's mouth closes over her pussy and she sticks her tongue in where two fingers push inside. It's very pink, as far as Katya can see in the dim light, just as Trixie's nipples, her tongue and her shirt.

Trixie's hands come down to Katya's head and take the rubber band out of her hair, ruffling it and grabbing it, making Katya groan against her.

"Yes, Kate, more," Trixie breathes, and Katya stops and looks up. Trixie's flushed face comes up and she looks desperate.

"Call me Katya."

"Kat-ya? Is your name not Kate?"

Katya shakes her head, teases Trixie's clit with a finger tip. Trixie's head falls back to the pillow.

"Well, fuck, Katya. Please, eat my pussy."

Trixie's slender fingers push on the back of Katya's head, and Katya's face dips down again, a grin on her lips. She takes her time to enjoy this girl, enjoys driving her crazy. It's been a while and it will probably be another long while, so Katya takes what she can get.

"Jesus fuck, I have to come, please," Trixie is panting and mewling, grabbing the sheets in her fists, moving her head from side to side. Katya has brought her to the edge for the second time now, and she slows her movements again.

"Katya, please." Her fingers grab Katya's hair and Katya smiles against her pussy. She looks up at Trixie's face and rubs her clit gently with her finger, right at that sensitive spot off to the side that she's discovered a while ago. Trixie whispers profanities again, bucks her hips, and Katya can see a sheen of sweat on her breasts, and she shudders and moans loudly through her orgasm.

"Oh my God," Trixie repeats under her breath when she's calming down. Katya kisses her labia, her thighs, her bellybutton, and then her neck.

"You're so fucking beautiful, baby," Katya whispers into Trixie's ear.

"I came so hard, wow." Trixie is still panting and grabs at Katya to pulls her close. "That was so good," she slurs a little as she kisses Katya again. Her hand goes down to Katya's pussy and Katya moans and rocks into Trixie's hand, her long fingers teasing.

"I need a moment," Trixie giggles, and turns to her side for a better angle.

"Just fuck me hard, I'm close," Kaya whispers to her lips. Trixie meets her eyes as she pushes two fingers slowly inside Katya and thrusts in deep. Katya nods and scrunches her eyes closed, concentrating on the pleasure shooting through her lower belly.

Trixie thrusts a few times, then adds a third finger, which makes Katya gasp and moan and rock her hips back and forth. Katya puts one finger on her own clit, gently rubbing it while Trixie quickens the rhythm of her thrusts.

Katya's orgasm is intense, a shiver running through her body, her breath stops in her throat, and then her body falls slack against Trixie.

They kiss and cuddle for a little while, until Trixie excuses herself to use the bathroom. Katya doesn't want to stop looking at her, and when she slips into the bathroom realises that she has a heart shaped ass.

When Trixie comes back, she's surprised to find Katya asleep. She looks cute, her hair a mess on her head, and Trixie can see now where she's been a little sloppy with the side shave. Maybe she can offer to fix it for her some time. Her heart jumps a little. She hopes Katya stays for breakfast, so they can talk, and she can get her number and see her again.

Trixie slides under the duvet and covers Katya with it as well. She's careful not to wake her as she gently spoons Katya's muscular back. If Trixie had expected anything from Katya, it wasn't that she was ripped like female bodybuilder, or that she'd change her name once her face was between Trixie's legs.

*

Trixie wakes with a slight hangover, her eyes scrunched shut against the sunlight streaming into her room, her mouth feeling like something died in there. She refuses to open her eyes for the moment and feels around in the bed. It's empty, and her eyes crack open. She sits up and looks around the room - Katya's clothes are gone, and on her pillow is a note, written on an envelope that was in Trixie's pile of mail on the dining table.

_Beautiful Beatrice,_

_Thank you for last night, it was magic._

_You are the sweetest, most gorgeous girl I've ever met._

_X K_

Her script is neat and classic, loopy, like a teacher.

"No! Fuck," Trixie curses out loud and gets up, rushing through the house as fast as she can with her throbbing head, looking around, but she's really gone. Trixie sighs and drags her naked ass back into her bedroom. The bed sheets are a mess and her clothes and boots are all over the floor. She sits on the bed and touches the pillow beside hers, picks it up, smells it. Katya didn't leave a scent, and Trixie's face is a sad frown.

Finally she meets someone special, a girl she connects with, someone who's not fake or clingy, and who's a real lesbian - how else can she eat pussy like that - and then she bails. Trixie groans in frustration. She doesn't even know her last name.

Just a block away from where Trixie is naked and frustrated, Katya's motel room is empty and a cleaner is taking off the bed sheets. Katya is on a bus. She sure liked Dallas, but she can't stay now that she's been so close to someone and told her what her real name is. She sighs as she leans her forehead against the window of the Greyhound and watches the city pass by.


	2. AUSTIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three months later, our girls meet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Trixie sings is 'Party of One' by Brandi Carlile. If you like country/folk by a dyke with a guitar and the voice of an angel, check her out. She has inspired my writing more than once. Not all of the lyrics apply to the story, but most of them do and this whole story started when I heard the first verse for the first time. 
> 
> Thx for reading <3

_July_

“Trix, wake up.” Someone is pushing her shoulder and Trixie moans.

“I’m sleeping!”

“Not anymore, we’re here,” Jacob chuckles and she hears him taking bags from the van.

Trixie sits up with a little groan and looks around. It’s a little cloudy outside, but warm, and the hotel looks nice. She rubs her eyes a little, trying not to smudge her makeup, but fails, and shrugs. She takes her backpack, her purse and her flip flops, which she steps into once she’s exited the van.

Trixie, Jacob, Dan, Chris, and David are on a summer tour, playing at festivals, fairs, some weddings and in bars. They’ve been on the road for a few weeks now, but they’ll stay in Austin for a week to get some rest.

Trixie lugs her suitcase into the hotel lobby and adds it to the pile the guys have formed on a luggage cart next to the reception desk, and then walks back to the van to see if there is more.

“We’re going to leave the rest and park it in the garage. It will be safe there,” Dan says as he closes up the back door to the van.

“Wait, I need my guitar!” Trixie says and pulls at the door.

“Babe, it’s not gonna go anywhere between now and…” Dan looks at his watch, “About six hours.”

Trixie sticks out her tongue at him.

“I know, I just like to have it close. And I’m gonna practise a little.”

He rolls his eyes and closes the van again, then gets behind the wheel.

“Oh, and I’m not your babe!” Trixie yells at him as he drives off, and she hears his loud laughter through the window.

It’s noon when they get to their rooms, three in total, the boys sharing and Trixie with one all to herself. It’s not an expensive hotel, but it’s neat and clean. Trixie rolls her luggage in and she’s glad to be staying in one place for a week. She can actually unpack and make a mess and it’s ok.

Trixie says no to lunch with the guys, instead eats a sandwich she bought earlier while sitting on her little balcony. The hotel has a nice park behind it and a golf course behind that, and she can see some guys in a cart driving over the green. She thinks about the song she’s been writing and if she wants to sing it tonight. It would be the first time, and it makes her nervous. She’s been singing her own songs for years, but this is different. This song touches her on a different level and she’s not sure if she can pull it off.

That evening at eight, Trixie and the boys are standing backstage, their bodies jittery with nerves. Trixie sips hot tea with honey, touring makes her voice a little raw, and Dan ties his long hair in a ponytail. The weather is really nice, and Trixie is wearing a pink plaid dress. It’s short, it’s tight, and it’s perfect, because she made it herself. There’s no pink plaid on the racks of any country themed store. She paired it with white cowboy boots and a white pleather jacket with lots of fringe and sparkly studs.

*

The TV in Katya’s room is on the local channel while she packs. In the last three months, she’s lived at three different places, and she’s collected more things than she thought. Things that she’s not going to need once she’s gone - some old shoes, trinkets, a winter jacket that she’s been carrying around for months and has never worn, and that she definitely doesn't need in Mexico.

Katya got the scare of her life when she saw her own picture on national TV yesterday morning, and at the same time she could slap herself for being surprised. It had taken so long that she’d become somewhat comfortable, but that was now over.

She stares at the TV, they’re broadcasting some local music festival, when she gets her second shock in two days.

“Ladies and gents, please welcome, Trixie Mattel and The Fenderbenders!”

A blonde and pink dream walks onto the stage, and Katya sags down on her knees right in front of the TV screen.

“Dear God,” she whispers, touching her lips with her fingers.

It had taken Katya a good while to get over leaving Trixie behind like that, but she couldn’t take any risks. She couldn’t tell her, she couldn’t make any promises, and she couldn’t go back. She shouldn’t have gone home with her in the first place, or even go to that bar, but once she did, she was done for. The moment that girl started talking to her, Katya knew she was a lost case. She’d taken the first Greyhound out of the station that morning, and it drove her to Austin. She figured it was far enough away and big enough to stay anonymous and regroup for a while.

And now, within the span of two days, Alexei and Trixie are somehow both back, and everything is fucked up.

Katya stares at the screen with her heart beating in her throat, and her eyes watering a little. Trixie looks so beautiful, so fucking perfect, her voice clear and sweet all over the field of the festival. The stage is big, the crowd is huge, and Katya feels a sense of pride.

“Fuck, fuck…” Katya paces her room, watching Trixie on the screen, her room a mess of garbage bags and luggage. She’s in a tiny, one-room apartment, the sole tennant in a building that’s supposed to be torn down at the end of the year. The city lets people rent there to make sure squatters won’t take over and kids won’t trash the place, and it’s been pretty convenient for her. There’s an old car in the parking lot that she’s going to drive to Mexico.

But now, Trixie is here, in Austin, and Katya can’t take her eyes off of her.

She makes a decision then, and starts carrying her stuff out to the car. It’s not too much, just two bags of clothes, a box of small essentials and some blankets, and the room is close to empty apart from the furniture. Katya gets in the car and drives through Austin. It’s dark now, but she knows her way around, and she arrives at the festival barely half an hour after Trixie entered the stage. She parks in in a dark corner of a grassy field and jogs up to the entrance of the festival. A bored teenager sits in the ticket booth, the area empty except for one security guard who looks just as bored.

“Can I still get a ticket?” Katya asks the girl.

“Uhm, it’s just two more hours or something,” the girl says with a shrug.

“That’s ok. How much?”  
  
Katya forks over the money and puts the wristband on. She jogs all the way to where it gets crowded. She can hear Trixie’s voice in her ears, all around her, and from a distance, she’s a small pink dot on the stage, all the lights following her while she sings her heart out. Katya’s heart is aching, and it’s not from exertion. She knows she’s crazy, but her life has never been normal, and now she’s just following what her crazy heart is telling her.

Katya manages to get quite close to the stage. It’s big, but not too high, and she gets a front row spot off to the side. Trixie’s band is good, but not that well-known outside of Dallas. They are warming up for the bigger names and the crowd is not as thick as it will be later on. She sees Trixie interacting with the audience on the other side of the stage, and hopes she comes to her side as well. But the song ends, the band waves, and the lights go down. Katya’s heart sinks, but the crowd screams and the lights are flashing around the stage for a full minute.

One single spotlight points at the center of the stage then, showing Trixie’s silhouette, and she’s taken off her jacket and put on a pink acoustic guitar. Katya laughs through her tears, only Trixie…

“Thank you!” Trixie yells at the crowd and blows them kisses.

“You guys have been amazing tonight! Before we go, I want to share an original song with you.” Trixie strums her guitar and looks out over the field.

“I wrote this for someone special, but I can’t play it for them. So it’s for everyone who gets a little lonely sometimes.”

Katya swallows thickly, and hopes against hopes that this is not going to be what she thinks. But once sentence in, she knows.

 _Waiter send this to the table, the party of one_   
_The only other lonely soul in this place_   
_And so you're finishing up your coffee_   
_But then where you're gonna run?_ _  
_ _Where'd you get that look on your face?_

Trixie’s eyes are closed as she plays and sings, and she doesn’t open them until the second verse starts.

 _You should always let the sun go down on your anger_   
_Let it burn you to sleep_   
_Bring it closer to danger_   
_To surrender and retreat_ _  
_ _Sing your sad soul to sleep_

Katya wipes at her eyes and curses to herself. The crowd around her gets a little more pushy, people hold up glow sticks and wave their arms with the music. The song finishes with Trixie singing ‘I am yours,’ over and over again, and Katya is ready to run up on the stage and drag her away and never let her go. It’s just that there are these burly security guys all around, and she doesn’t think it would go over well.

She should go now. Leave the festival, get in her car, have a good cry, and get on her way to cross the border. She would be right on schedule, still. But Katya can’t leave. She’s mesmorised by the girl on the stage, who only has a little trouble getting through the song, but gets an ocean of applause once it’s done.

Trixie sings one more song of her own, and the boys join her for this. There’s a good twenty minutes of their performance left, and Trixie enjoys every second of it. When they take a bow, the audience is wild for them, and she knows for a fact that this is another step in the direction of being a professional musician. Maybe she doesn’t have to keep her day job anymore, some time soon.

Somewhere off to the side, Trixie hears someone scream her name repeatedly, and she instantly giggles - what a way to make someone feel famous. David pokes her side then, when they come up from their second bow and high five each other.

“Trix, look,” David says and points down to the front row just as they leave the stage.

Trixie stops dead in her tracks while the lights go down and roadies already start taking down their stuff to set up for the next band. There’s a girl in the front row with a straight black bob and a serious undercut. She’s wearing an oversized hoodie and she’s waving at Trixie.

“Kate?” Trixie yells, but she doesn’t think Katya can hear her, although she nods furiously.

Trixie makes her way off stage and through backstage in the dark. At the back of the stage, the boys are enjoying a beer with other artists and call her over, but she’s not listening. Trixie runs to the side entrance of the backstage area as fast as she can. There’s one of those huge security guys with a thick neck and seriously frown.

“Can I get my friend in?” Trixie asks, showing him her pass.

“Just one?” Trixie nods. She hopes Katya understood her pointing to the side, if she even saw that in the dark.

The security guy opens the door and steps outside, looking around, and Trixie joins him, impatient, and then Katya appears out of nowhere.

“Hey, come on.” Trixie takes her hand and pulls her along. She once again ignores her band mates and the other artists, although she doesn’t think they’re paying her any attention, and drags Katya all the way to the back of the field, where she has a small tent with the boys, where they can change and keep their stuff.

They haven’t said anything at all while walking there, and in the light of the tent, Trixie looks at Katya’s face. Her hair is different but her eyes are the same, and she’s wearing the same oversized, sporty clothes.

“Katya,” Trixie stammers, then grabs her face and kisses her full on the lips.

Katya whines and pulls Trixie closer by her waist, opening her mouth and licking Trixie’s lips.

“I was so angry with you,” Trixie whispers.

“I’m sorry,” Katya says, pushing her body against Trixie’s. Trixie ends the kiss and looks at Katya again.

“I think I understand,” Trixie says. “Was that you on the news last night? The police is looking for you?”

Katya’s head hangs down when she nods, and Trixie pulls her to a table with chairs around it and sits her down.

“So your husband is what, Russian mafia?”

Katya scoffs. “He’d wish.”

She looks up then, and takes Trixie’s hand from where it’s on the table.

“I really can’t talk about this with you. I have to go.”

Trixie’s hand grabs Katya’s tightly.

“I don’t wanna let you go, not again.”

Trixie looks at Katya, her stare intense, and Katya can’t look away.

“What I sang out there, I don’t know if you heard that, but that’s true. That’s how I feel. I know we only just met, we hardly know each other, but… I just... what I feel can’t be wrong, right? What my heart tells me? What my whole soul is telling me?”

“What, then?” Katya asks. She can’t help herself. She knows this is a mistake, that she’s in danger, and by being here, she’s putting Trixie in danger.

“That we belong together.” Trixie says it with so much conviction, and it’s a stab to Katya’s heart. Maybe she’s right, maybe not, but it doesn’t matter. She gets up, and Trixie follows her, still holding on to her wrist.

“Katya, Katya, please. Just… stay with me tonight,” Trixie pulls at Katya’s arm and wraps it around herself, pressing her body up against Katya, kissing her again, tears wet on her cheeks. If she can get one more night, it’s better than nothing.

Katya is powerless against Trixie’s lips, her tongue, her hands grabbing Katya’s clothes, traveling underneath to touch her skin.

They drive to the hotel in Katya’s beat up car, and Trixie takes her upstairs.

“I have to clean up. Come on.” Trixie beckons Katya with one finger as she goes into the bathroom.

Katya watches as Trixie removes a little hairpiece, Katya unzips her dress and kisses her shoulder blades, unhooks her bra, helps her undress and watches again when Trixie takes makeup remover and cleans her face.

Katya undresses while Trixie starts the shower, and she feels Trixie’s eyes on her a she pulls the sweater over her head, and the rest of her clothes, until she steps into the shower stall where Trixie is already soaked and Katya moans at the sight. She pushes Trixie against the cold wall, the water now drumming onto Katya’s back and over her hair, and she kisses her, hard and deep, tongues fighting for dominance, almost angry. They have things on their minds, so many things, worries, problems, thoughts, but they let their bodies lead this moment.

They wash each other with Trixie’s creamy, honey infused body wash, and Katya gets down to her knees to bury her face in Trixie’s ass. It’s so perfect, full round cheeks, wide hips, sloping down into firm thighs that Katya’s fingers squeeze hard. She turns Trixie around and opens her mouth to her pussy, long licks over her lips and clit, while Trixie’s hips roll and grind and her head is back against the wall.

They dry off as quickly as possible and get on the bed, Trixie crawling all over Katya and kissing her senseless. Her mouth is so sweet, so gentle, when she wants to, and then aggressive sometimes, and she takes Katya’s breath away.

Trixie teases Katya’s pussy with her fingers while kissing her, sucking on her nipples until they are hard and sensitive, and Katya can’t keep her hands off of her ass, how her hips sway against Katya, how she feels the muscles on the backs of her thighs tremble with the movements.

Katya pulls at Trixie’s hips, pulls her on top so she’s straddling her, and then slides her body down until she’s face to face with her sweet pussy. Trixie squeals a little, giggles, and then moans when Katya sucks on her and swirls her tongue around.

Trixie rides Katya’s face, she eats Katya out, fucks her hard with her fingers, Katya gives her long, slow licks over her pussy until she is desperate for release.

They lie tangled up in each other, heavy breaths, the room dark and humid around them, and Katya starts to talk, whispers against Trixie’s neck.

“I met Alexei when I was twenty. I was addicted to alcohol and cocaine, and he introduced me to meth. He paid me for sex, but then one day when I overdosed, he drove me to a mafia doctor and saved my life. He said he’d help me get clean if I’d marry him, and I did it, I was high as fuck, but nobody at the courthouse seemed to notice or care.”

Katya moved in with Alexei and became his most important business associate. She carried drugs, cash, and lots of burner phones to communicate with drug runners, dealers and bosses. Alexei employed a solid fifty people at one point, but then there seemed to be a mole in his organisation and he turned very hostile to everyone around him, including his wife.

“There had been several bad deals, where the police was clearly getting information up front about what was happening, and it turned so bad that he was afraid to leave the house. Our marriage had been a facade from the beginning, we both knew that, but I couldn’t deny him anything - not sex, not the work I did, because I felt I owed him my life.”

“How come you finally ran?” Trixie asks softly, stroking Katya’s arm where it’s slung over her chest.

“He started getting violent. Well, he always was, but… not to me, not until last year. He really lost his mind, he wanted me to stay home all hours of the day. I used to just go out on my own, I had girlfriends, I hung out with people. But when he started treating me like a slave, and hitting me, I… I couldn’t deal with that.”

Katya shakes her head and sits up to check the time.

“Right now, he’s in a really bad position. I made an anonymous call to the police and they managed to bring in two of his associates. I think he knows it was me. I was attacked in the middle of the street in broad daylight when Alexei was out of town. I went to see a doctor, who stitched me up, but he was very pushy about calling the police, so I ran from his office. I went home, packed a bag, and went straight to airport. Took the first plane out and landed in Dallas.”

A small smile breaks on Katya’s face, and Trixie pulls her close again, kissing her.

“I think I’m in love with you,” Trixie whispers.

“Baby,” Katya’s voice is hoarse and tight. “I have nothing to give.” Katya strokes Trixie’s face, looking at her eyes shining in the dark.

Trixie breaks their embrace then, and moves to switch on the bedside lamp. She pulls the duvet up around her body, and around Katya too.

“There’s something I haven’t told you.” Trixie’s face is serious, and Katya nods and waits.

“I’m using my mom’s last name, because my dad is Philip Macey.”

Katya’s mouth opens but no sound comes out, and Trixie can see her eyes widen and her skin turn a little pale.

“Your dad is in the FBI?”

Katya’s heartbeat is in her throat and she feels her hands getting cold.

“He’s the director of the New York office.”

“I know. I met him.”

“What?”

Katya gets up from the bed and goes around the room to find all of her clothes, and quickly starts putting them on.

“A few years ago, Alexei killed an undercover FBI agent. He didn’t know about it until the FBI was already on his tail, so he bailed and left me behind. I didn’t even know where he was. Some agents came to question me, and I was brought into their office, and Macey… your dad, he was there.”

“Please don’t go, Katya…” Trixie gets up from the bed and puts on her sleep shirt.

“I have to, fuck.”

Katya is ready to go within minutes.

“But maybe my dad can help you, I mean, if you tell them your story…”

“Honey, this man claims he loves me and yet he’s held a gun to my face more times that I can count.”

She sounds a little condescending and it makes Trixie angry. She crosses her arms and leans against the wall while Katya laces up her sneakers.

“Where will you go?”

“Right now, I’m going to drive to the border and cross it. After that, I don’t care.”  
  
“Where will you cross?”

Katya looks up. “Don’t try this with me, babe.”  
  
Trixie dashes through the room and fubles through her purse, then stops Katya in the doorway. She puts a small, white card in the pocket of her hoodie.

“Call me.”


	3. NEW YORK / TORRÉON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trixie has made a tough decision, an important decision, even though it could potentially ruin Katya's life and everything Trixie has day dreamed about since she met the beautiful girl at the bar.   
> Katya's life is turned upside down once again, but she has no choice than to go with it. What does she have to lose?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I finished it last night, so why not post another ;)

_September_

“Mr. Macey, I have a visitor for you.”

Philip Macey has his phone on speaker while he scrolls through a document on his laptop.

“There’s nothing on the schedule now, Marcia. I have to prepare for the meeting.”

“It’s Beatrice Mattel, Mr. Macey. She says she’s your daughter.”

Macey looks at the phone as if he can see Marcia right through it.

“What? Where is she?”

“In the waiting room. Should I-”

“Bring her in.”

He closes his laptop and stands up, walks to the door, and sees his secretary come around the corner with a tall blonde girl in tow. A woman, actually. She’s not a girl anymore, and he can’t suppress the smile that breaks through on his face.

“Hey, daddy,” Trixie says, her smile wide and radiant, her eyes sparkling. He pulls her into his office and envelops her in a hug.

“Honey, why didn’t you say you were coming?” He keeps her at arm’s length and strokes her hair. “You look good.”

“Thanks. I am not here for a family visit, actually.”

They sit down on the couch by the coffee table, on the other side of the room from his desk and windows with an amazing view over the city. Trixie wastes no time and immediately starts talking.

“If I would tell you a story of someone I know, who is connected to organised crime, what would you do?”

Philip frowns. “How do you know this person?”

“Daddy. Don’t answer with a question.” Trixie holds up her index finger, quoting one of his old life lessons back to him.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. What would I do, well, I would determine if this is a person who needs to be detained, and then I would have you talk to one of the agents. I can’t get involved with an investigation that involves a family member.”

Trixie thinks for a moment.

“This person’s life is in danger, and I don’t think they should be detained. The crimes they committed… were committed under pressure.”

“You think they are innocent?”

“If that means they committed crimes but can’t be held responsible, yes. They are.”

“If they really are, that will come up in the investigation.”  
  
“But how will you keep her safe?”  
  
Trixie closes her eyes and sighs at her slip up, but her dad doesn't comment on it.

“We have facilities for that, like a safe house, or sometimes we do put them in detention until we can guarantee their safety.”

“And if detention is dangerous for them?”

Philip sighs and puts his hand on Trixie’s shoulder.

“Why don’t you just tell me?”  
  
“I… I don’t want to make things worse for them. I want to help them, I…” Trixie feels her face turn warm and she looks down at her hands in her lap. “I don’t wanna lose her.”

“What has she done?”

“She’s married to Alexei Zamolodchikov.”

When her dad doesn’t answer right away, Trixie looks up at him, and sees the shock on his face. He is at a loss for words for a few seconds.

“Trix…”

“I didn’t know. I met her a while ago, I… we… I’m in love with her, dad.”

“Jesus, Trixie.”

Trixie keeps silent and bites her lip nervously, while her dad stands up and paces the room.

“Where is she?”

“I am not sure.”

“Does she want to turn herself in?”

“No. She’s scared he’ll still be able to get to her.”

Philip goes to his desk and rifles through a pile of paper files, then comes up with a brown folder. He lays it open on the coffee table, showing a bunch of candid photos of Alexei, his men, and Katya.

“Yekaterina Petrovna Zamolodchikova, an addicted prostitute, became the wife of aspiring Russian mafia boss Alexei ten years ago. She’s lived a rich life since then, was a part of high class society, and is suspected of committing several serious crimes. And you’re telling me you’re in love with her?”

Trixie just nods, staring at the pictures of Katya and Alexei, out and about, at parties, Katya in beautiful designer gowns, sharp pant suits, wearing different colors of hair, big sunglasses, getting out of expensive cars and carrying suspicious briefcases. She’s usually surrounded by muscular men in sharp suits, and Alexei looks no different. He’s obviously older than her, tall, bulky, with carefully coiffed hair and a well-kept beard.

“What were you thinking, Trix?”

She sighs. “I wasn’t, dad. I just met a pretty girl and we hit it off, I didn’t know she was a wanted criminal who’s husband nearly beat her to death before she ran away.”

Philip’s face softens and he sits with her on the couch again.

“Listen, what we could do is this: I can call one of my agents, they will talk to you for a while, you tell them the whole story, and we document it. We can discuss with you how we go about it when we get to her.”

“Like, how?”

“We will arrest her, we will question her, she gets herself a lawyer, she testifies against her husband’s organisation. Ideally, we capture all of them and she gets a good deal for testifying. She can be sentenced to a few years, or even nothing at all, and she’ll be safe.”

“Until they get out.”

“We can offer her a witness protection program.”

“Then I can’t see her anymore.”

“Not necessarily. She can choose where she wants to be relocated and can see who ever she wants. Since you are not actually tied to her on paper, and we can take your testimony anonymously, I think it would be possible.”

Trixie contemplates for a moment, and Philip’s phone rings. He talks for a short moment, and packs some things into his briefcase.

“I’m sorry honey, I have to leave for a meeting.”

“Daddy, be honest with me,” Trixie says as she stands up and walks with him to the door.

“Can you promise me she will be safe?”

“I can promise you that we will do whatever we can to ensure that. If she gives us enough information to go on, and we get them all…”

Trixie nods.

Later that day, Trixie sits in an interview room with two agents, one old, one young, both dressed in suits, very much caricatures of what people think FBI agents look like. There are no windows in the room, and no camera’s, just a voice recorder. Trixie had to go through a metal detector and leave all her personal belongings behind when she entered this part of the building.

They talk for three hours straight, and Trixie is completely exhausted when she leaves. The sun is already slowly going down and Trixie’s stomach is queasy. She’s not sure if it’s because she hasn’t eaten anything since breakfast, or because guilt is eating her up.

She has dinner at her parents’ house that evening and stays with them for a couple of days before returning to Dallas.

*

_October_

It’s about fifteen to twenty minutes drive from Katya’s house to her job, and she’s more than happy to get up at four in the morning so she can start work at five. She has absolutely no problem donning the unflattering uniform and wash sheets, towels and clean hotel rooms all day long. She has a job, her first job ever, and at the age of thirty, that makes her proud.

Katya is settled in the small, Mexican town of Matamoros, in the state of Coahuila de Zaragoza. It’s small enough to be a little remote, but not so small that everybody knows each other. Katya is renting a small brick house at the edge of the town, on a retired farmer’s land. He no longer has any staff to put up in there and needed a tenant. She pays him up front every week, in cash, and he doesn’t ask any questions. Maybe that’s because his English isn’t great, and her Spanish doesn’t go far enough to offer him any more information.

For her job, Katya doesn’t need to speak Spanish. She understands the orders that the manager barks at her perfectly well: clean the rooms and do it fast, and stay out of the way of the guests, and definitely don’t talk to them.

The guests are mostly rich Americans and other foreigners who come to the city of Torréon to play golf and enjoy the luxuries the hotel has to offer. A room is around $ 150 a night, which Katya doesn’t even make in a six-day work week, but she doesn’t care. She’s not here to make money, she still has plenty of dirty dollars in the bag she stole from Alexei. She’s mostly working because she needs something to do, a schedule, an obligation. Something to force her out of bed in the morning.

When Katya just arrived in Mexico, she had a really hard time for a while. She lived in her car, shopped for food at gas stations and neglected her health. She stopped working out, she bought alcohol and cigarettes and lost her path for a few weeks. All she did all day long was drive, until she ended up in Torréon and got caught driving and drinking. She got off with a warning because she had only just started drinking that day, barely a few glasses of vodka in her system, but it woke her up and got her head back into the game.

That doesn’t mean that Katya is doing great, or that she’s happy. She sits outside of her square, brick house, smokes, drinks soda, eats cheap food, sleeps and works. It makes her wonder how long she should do this until she can… do something else.

Trixie. Katya thinks about her a lot, actually every day. She might be in love with Katya, and Katya might be in love, too, but it doesn’t matter. Alexei and his guys are out there somewhere, looking for Katya, waiting to kill her.

“Excuse me, Miss?”

A hotel guest speaks to Katya, and she looks around before she answers. The woman is probably around fifty, in good shape, and she looks like every other American that vacations here - golf shorts, those weird sneakers they wear, and a baseball cap - although she looks like she could be Mexican.

“I seem to have a problem with the sink in my bathroom, can you help me?” The woman asks, her accent definitely American.

“I can call the janitor for you,” Katya says, hesitating as the woman enters her room.

“Well, I think it’s nothing, maybe that thingie under the sink just needs cleaning,” The woman says while Katya follows her into the bathroom.

“The siphon? I can take a look.”

Katya hears a sound behind her, the door to the room closes and locks, and suddenly she hears a gun being cocked. It’s the small, mechanical click that causes her body to freeze and her ears to whizz. Her hands go up without being told anything, and her eyes slip closed.

“Don’t move,” says the woman. “Are you armed?”

“No.”

“Are you carrying any drugs?”  
  
Katya swallows.

“No. What’s going on?”

“Yekaterina Petrovna Zamolodchikova?”

Katya nods with a sigh. No point in hiding it now.

“Please turn around.”

Katya does, and opens her eyes. The woman holds her gun pointed to the floor, and two men behind her put their guns away as well.

“We’re FBI, we just wanna talk,” says one of the men. They’re all dressed like golfers, although it doesn’t look as convincing on the men as it does on the woman.

“And you need guns for that?” Katya asks.

“Please, come sit down.” The woman leads her into the suite and searches her body, then points at a chair for her to sit on.

“Is the room secure?” Katya asks. She knows it might be a stupid question, because she’s sure they would have checked, but still. The woman confirms it is, and then sits on the bed opposite Katya.

“Where is your husband, Mrs. Zamolodchikova?”

Katya stares at the woman.

“I have no idea. I haven’t seen him in a while, and I want to keep it that way.”

“He hasn’t contacted you at all?”

Katya shakes her head. The woman regards her for a moment, maybe to determine if she’s lying.

“Look, can you tell me if I’m under arrest? Because I haven’t heard my rights and I don’t see a lawyer anywhere.”

Katya’s nerves have settled a little and she’s very aware that this situation is more than weird. If any law enforcement is big on rules and technicalities, it’s the FBI, and these three aren’t following any rules.

“We’re here to ask you to turn yourself in. We think you can help us dismantle your husband’s operation.”

Katya blinks a few times, and then laughs, but there’s no humor to it.

“Oh, really! Well, that’s an interesting plan. Have you also planned how you’re going to keep me alive?”

“We can offer protection.”

“Amazing.”

The woman sighs and stands, walks to the window beside Katya’s chair and peers through the blinds.

“There are twelve local law enforcement officers here and five federal agents here, Mrs. Zamolodchikova. I advise you to think about your options.”

Katya sighs and leans forward, elbows on her arms. She rolls her head on her neck and rubs her eyes with the palms of her hands.

“So the options are, I turn myself in and I’ll spill my heart out to the DA in exchange for sentence reduction, or you’ll arrest me anyway and take me forcefully, and I’ll end up in jail just like those assholes. Correct?”

The woman nods.

“That’s about correct.”

She reaches in her back pocket then, and Katya flinches for a moment as her hand goes past the gun in the shoulder holster under her sports jacket, but then she holds out a small envelope.

“There’s also this. I don’t know what it is, by I’ve been asked to give it to you.”

The envelope is sealed and there’s nothing written on it. Katya opens it and find a handwritten letter on plain, white paper. The handwriting is round and girly, and her throat gets tight when she starts reading.

_K,_

_Waiter send this to the table, the party of one_ _  
_ _The only other lonely soul in this place_

_If you want the girl next door_

_Then go next door and go right now_

_And don't look back, don't turn around_

_Don't even think about your freedom_

_Or taking that flight_

_Or going back upon your promise after fighting for the right_

_I loved you the first time I saw you_

_And you know I love you still_

_But I am tired_

_And I am yours_

_You were right, it was magical._

_I think there’s a lot more where that came from._

_T._

Katya’s eyes blur with her tears, and she reads it again, two, three times. Trixie mixed the lyrics of two songs together, lifting out the sentences that meant something to her, and even though it was jumbled and cryptic, Katya understands every word.

She understands now that Trixie ratted her out to the FBI, probably told them she was on the run to Mexico.

One of the male agents approaches Katya and holds out a tissue for her to wipe her face with.

“Can we go to my place and pack my things before I go with you? I also need to pay my landlord and resign from my job.”

The woman at the window turns to her.

“You’ll do it?”

Katya stands and sniff, wiping her nose with the tissue.

“If you can keep me alive long enough, I’ll give it a shot. I don’t have a lot to lose.”   
  
She looks at the envelope in her hand and she knows she’s lying, maybe more to herself than to the agent. She has a whole world to lose, and it’s all enclosed in that little T. at the end of the letter.

Katya is confused as to why the agents are so lenient with her, letting her talk to her manager, clear out her locker, collect her cash payment for the days she’s worked this week. One of the guys joins her as she talks to her landlord and pays him in full for the rest of the month. She’s not sure if he understands what’s going on, but he takes the money and shakes her hand.

Back at her place, the agents have searched it and confirm it’s clean - which means no bugs, no weapons, and no drugs are in there. Katya takes her two large sport bags from under the single bed and shoves one to the female agent standing next to her.

“That’s drug money I stole from Alexei when I left.”

She fills the other bag with her belongings. There’s not much, just clothes, a couple of books and her laptop and phone, and then they’re on their way.

*

It feels weird for Katya to be back in New York City after all this time. It feels like home, but also, not. She was born in Vladivostok, all the way at the end of the trans-Siberian railway, but lived in the USA since she was little. No place has ever felt like home because her parents moved a lot, her father following whatever job he could get. It’s hard to find a place on the east coast of the United States where Katya hasn’t lived for a short while.

The first time Katya got a stable place to live was with Alexei. She lived with him in his apartment, then in the town house upstate, and then to the loft in the city. She got to know the city from the inside out, not just as a visitor or someone doing business, but as an inhabitant. She knows where the good shops are, where she can get traditional Russian food to remind her of her grandmother, and where she can find the best clothes.

Katya was a bit of a socialite for a while, but it wasn’t something she enjoyed. Alexei wanted her to be noticed, he wanted to take her out and flaunt her, and he pressed her to work out less to look more feminine. The only reason Katya liked going out sometimes, was if she met girls she could hook up with. Most of them were either also married, or not openly queer, like Katya, and nobody cared about being serious or monogamous. It was fun for Katya, something that helped her deal with the situation at home.

Upon arriving in NYC, the agents brought Katya to the Metropolitan Correctional Center in Manhattan. They had arranged for her to stay there because Katya had requested it. She didn’t think any safe house or guarded hotel room would keep her safe from Alexei, especially once he knew she was in town - and she was pretty convinced he knew.

One good thing about being in prison without a conviction, was that she didn’t have to interact with anyone. She couldn’t walk around among the population, she wasn’t sure why, maybe the agents worried that she would run into familiar faces - which wasn’t all that far-fetched, if not for the fact that Alexei had never employed any females apart from Katya. Inmates who worked the kitchen came and brought her food. Even though she couldn't choose what she wanted to eat, and most of the food was bland and cooked to mush, Katya was grateful for being alone.

On Monday morning, when she’d been in her cell for about 35 hours, the female agent that had picked her up in Mexico was back to take her to the police station for her official arrest. Katya was booked as a suspect and taken to an interview room for questioning. Katya refused to talk without a lawyer present, and since there was no one she could call because all the lawyers she knew were either working for Alexei or buying his drugs, the agent arranged for someone to be appointed to her. Katya spent some time in a holding cell at the police station to wait for them.

A tall, African American woman named Benet came to collect Katya a little later, and they sat down in an interview room. The lawyer had brought Katya a cup of coffee and introduced herself.

“I’ve come here on a whim, Mrs. Zamolodchikova, because I just happened to be available. I’d like to get to know you and your case before I sit in on any questioning.”

Katya just nodded, impressed by the beautiful woman in her sharp pant suit and eternally thankful for the hot, black coffee.

“You are suspected of leading a criminal organisation with the purpose of selling drugs, money laundering, and an accessory to several murders. The list goes on. Can you tell me why you were in Mexico?”

Katya sighed. “It seemed the best place to go to hide from my husband. He runs the business, not me.”

“And how did you end up in Torréon?”

“Well, first I went from New York to Dallas, then Austin, and then I drove to Mexico. I just drove around for a while and then got an opportunity to stay in a place close to Torréon.”

“And how did you maintain yourself and pay for your travels?”

Katya looked down at her hands around the paper coffee cup. She was cold, the chair was uncomfortable, and she felt dread heavy on her shoulders.

“I stole a bag of money from my husband. There was always a lot of cash at our place.”

“Why did you run from him?”

“He got violent with me.”

“That happened recently?”

“Since about a year.”

Katya noticed that the lawyer barely wrote anything down in the notebook she had in front of her, just short words and numbers.

“What was the event that made you run?”

“When he used a boxing brace on me and tore me open, here,” Katya lifted her shirt and showed her back, where a scar was properly healed, but still a little red. The other woman nodded.

“He also had me beat up, and put a gun to my head a few times, and then I thought, well… I’ve been with him long enough, maybe it’s time to move on. It was, like… wait for him to eventually kill me at home, or run away and try not to get killed while I had freedom.”

She shrugged again. Ms. Benet was silent for a moment.

“I know of your husband’s practises, he’s known for his his temper. Why did it take almost ten years, you think, for him to turn on you?”

“I think he actually loved me, or maybe he was just sort of… obsessed. My behavior changed when I was clean for a long time and actually started getting more confidence. He didn’t like that, he didn’t want me to make my own decisions. He’s very controlling.”

“Mrs. Zamolodchikova-”

“Please, call me Katya.”

“Katya. Has he abused you sexually as well?”

Katya looked up, and Ms. Benet thought she looked like a scared rabbit.

“We were married, so we had sex.”

“Yes, but have you ever refused it? Or felt that you were pressured into it? Sexual relations within a marriage are not automatically consensual.”

Katya thought about this for a moment.

“The whole marriage was… fake. I married him when I was high off my ass, and he provided drugs and paid me for sex. The marriage was just an arrangement, and I was off the streets.”

After a long, intense conversation, the lawyer decides it’s been enough. She promises to visit Katya at the prison tomorrow and be present for the questioning by the FBI agent.

“Is there anything I can bring you tomorrow? Do you need food, or books or something?”

“Oh yes, books would be great, and chocolate? There isn’t any chocolate in jail.” Katya shows a small smile and the lawyer pats her hand on the table.

“No problem, I’ll hook you up. Anything else?”  
  
Katya bites her lip and stares at the floor.

“Well… there’s… someone I really wanna talk to, but I don’t have their number. It’s… it’s in my phone.

“I can see what I can do, what’s their name?”

“Beatrice Mattel. I’m not sure if that’s her full name. Her dad…” Katya swallows and shifts in her chair. “Philip Macey is her father.”

Ms. Benet looks up then. “FBI NY Director, Philip Macey? How do you know her?”

“We met in Dallas. I think she was the one who sent the FBI in my direction.”

The lawyer puts her pen down and folds her hands.

“Katya. You’re telling me this girl turned you in? Why do you wanna talk to her?”

“We… I…” Katya’s face turns red and tears well in her eyes for the first time since they started talking.

“We had a thing. I think she did it because… she loves me.”

Katya can’t look at the other woman and wishes she could just vanish into the ground. She’s not used to talking about things like this, especially not when it involves a woman. She has never really come out or talked to anyone about her sexuality, apart from Trixie.

“I have to think about this, but I’ll see you tomorrow.”

That evening on the bottom bunk of her prison bed, in the otherwise empty cell, Katya cries under her rough wool blanket. It’s all just so much, and she doesn’t know what’s going to happen next, and where things are going to go, and how she can ever stay a step ahead of Alexei, or what will happen if they arrest him but he gets out in however many years.


	4. CLOSURE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katya accepts her fate and tries to help the FBI to the best of her ability. She's shut out from the world, in a small prison cell, lonely but safe, until the FBI Director allows her a Christmas gift that changes her feelings about the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit is going down, brace yourself for some angsty moments. This is the last scary chapter, the next one will be chill. Thanks for reading XO

It’s late afternoon on a Saturday when Trixie’s phone rings with an unknown number, using the area code for New York City. Her heart skips a beat and she quickly picks up.

“This is a collect call, press one to accept the costs.”

Trixie’s face breaks out in a sweat as she fumbles to get to the keypad on her phone and press one. The dial tone sounds a few times, and then a click announces that they are connected.

“Hello?” Trixie says.

“Trixie?”  
  
“Katya!”

“Hi…”

“Oh my God. How are you?”

“Uhm, ok, I guess.”

“You’re in New York?”

“I’m in jail.”

Trixie’s mouth falls open and she starts shaking a little bit, and sits down on a stool at her breakfast bar.

“Oh fuck. I’m sorry,” Trixie starts, but Katya interrupts her.

“No, no, don’t be. It’s ok. I’m safe here.”

“Did you… what happened?”

“I don’t have much time, other people are in line to make calls as well. I just wanted to let you know I’m ok.”

“Thanks for calling. It’s so nice to hear your voice,” Trixie says softly, and swallows to get rid of the thickness in her throat.

“You, too. I hope you’re well. I think… I think I’m gonna be ok. It’s gonna take some time though.”

“Ok. I understand if you can’t say anything, but... “

“I turned myself in. That’s all I can really say.”

“Have you been charged?”

“No, but there’s a lot going on, I just... “  
  
“You can’t say, I get it.” Trixie sighs. “As long as you’re safe.”

“I am. It’s a little lonely here, but I’m safe, and… well. I’m working on things.”

“I wish I could see you,” Trixie says.

“It’s a bit too far to come visit.”

“Yeah. How long do you think it’s gonna take?”

“I have no idea, long.” Katya clears her throat. “I have to go, baby. I… I miss you.”

Trixie’s eyes water and her hand goes to her forehead as if that can keep the emotion at bay.

“Miss you too,” Trixie croaks out.

Then it’s over, and Trixie sits in silence, just the sounds from the street coming in through the opened window. She wipes away a stray tear and laughs at herself. Maybe her decision to talk to her dad wasn’t so bad, after all. He’d refused to talk to her about her story after she’d given an anonymous interview to the FBI agents. Weeks had gone by, and now Katya was suddenly there, out of nowhere, on the phone.

Trixie picks herself up and continues the chores she was doing around the house, her mind full of Katya - her voice, how small she sounded, how far away she is now, and the memories they’d made together. There wasn’t much, they just spent two nights together, but they were vivid in her mind and all she wanted was to have more of that.

Trixie hadn’t been with anyone else since she’d met Katya. She’d gone through a difficult time when Katya disappeared the second time, because they had both been frustrated with the situation, and with each other, and then there was a whole lot of nothingness for a long time. It had made Trixie very down and she turned inward, questioning what she actually wanted in her life.

Sometimes, something bad inspires something good, and in Trixie’s case it meant that she’d been writing a shit ton of songs while still working her office job, and she’d been making clips of her playing the songs and put them online. She was saving every dollar she could, trying to make enough money to pay for a studio to record her songs and produce an album. She had taken a second job, working in a local grocery store on the weekends, and still performed with the guys a few nights a week. All in all, she was exhausted, but kept her goal in mind.

And now, Katya.

*

_December_

It took Katya weeks to tell the FBI everything she knew about Alexei Zamolodchikov and his organisation, and her lawyer was with her every step of the way.

Bebe Benet was a full-blooded African, and the smartest woman Katya had ever met, and she was in complete awe of her intellect and eloquence when ever she spoke to the authorities. She had explained to Katya that with the way the FBI agents had tracked her down and then took her from Mexico, they had actually messed up their case against her from day one. The information from the anonymous source - who Katya and Bebe knew was Trixie, but the agents didn’t know that - had pointed them in the right direction, making it easy to track Katya down, but there was no way this testimony would hold up in court if there was no actual witness to back it up. And Philip Macey wasn’t about to expose his daughter to Russian criminals, so the source stayed anonymous.

Taking Katya to New York on a commercial flight without officially arresting her had been a national safety hazard, Bebe explained. In the eyes of the law, Katya was a dangerous criminal, even if they had made sure she wasn’t armed.

All of this didn’t stop Katya from explaining every little detail about Alexei’s operation. She wanted to be able to live her life in relative safety, and she knew that wasn’t an option as long as those guys were out on the streets.

Katya told Agent Del Río that Alexei was an extremely sensitive and hot headed man. He would make irrational decisions, he would get angry in a second and was known for killing guys on the spot when they didn’t do exactly what he wanted. She had been his voice of reason for a long time, and she wasn’t sure how he was acting now that she was no longer by his side to calm him down. In a way she even felt sorry for him, growing up inside the Russian mafia, but cast out by his dictator-like father, to then become a low life criminal. He had build up quite a reputation over time, but the feud between him and the New York City leg of the mafia was ongoing. His father had long since passed, but Alexei was still fighting his brother and other family members who’d taken over.

Months passed until something actually happened, but the FBI suddenly got an opportunity to take action. They had Katya listen to phone taps from several Russian criminals, in and out of the maffia, and she detected a pattern in their cryptic Russian conversations. Something that an outsider, even if they spoke Russian, might have not been able to detect, because they wouldn’t know the code names they used, or what their casual sounding conversations actually meant.

“They’re planning to kill Yevgeni,” Katya says suddenly and gets up from her chair. She’s wearing big headphones and her face turns white as a sheet. She leans forward with one hand on the table of the interview room, the other pushing the headphones closer to her ear.

“Oh my God, they wanna take Yevgeni,” she whispers.

“Katya, sit down,” Bianca Del Río says and taps her arm. The recording ends then, and Katya looks stricken.

“Yevgeni Zamolodchikov?”

Katya nods. “This guy, Arlan, he’s a runner for the mob, but he’s talking to Pyotr Tsaryov, he’s Alexei’s bodyguard, and Pyotr is asking about Yevgeni’s schedule, and how many guys will be there, and... “

Katya can’t stay in her seat and starts pacing the room.

“They’re going to have to pull out all the stops, because Yevgeni’s security is so tight, and he’s gonna be there with a client. They’re going to have to bring Alexei to a separate location, I know he wants to do it himself, but…”

“You think he wants to pull the trigger on his brother?” Bianca also stands up.

“Yes. I know he wants to, he’s been wanting to for years. He wants to blow out his brains at close range while he sees that it’s his little brother doing it.”

Katya is out of breath from the adrenaline rushing through her veins.

“Bianca, this is it. This is your shot. You can take them all at once.”

The agent’s eyes widen.

“I’m serious. Alexei is gonna put all his guys up for this. He’s going to use a few of them to protect himself, and he’s gonna send the rest on a kill mission. Either that or he’s going to do it himself, and then he also needs all his guys. There’s just… like… half of them left now, i think.”

Bianca goes to the wall full of pictures and notes, where they identified all of Alexei’s guys and who they often interacted with, with Katya’s help. Katya walks to the wall and points out the guys on the photos.

“This is Arlan, he’s just a runner, but he’s obviously not loyal to Yevgeni,” she points to the photo of the mafia boss. “This is Pyotr, he’s very important to Alexei. He’s in charge of Alexei’s personal security. His second man, Max Sharov, was my bodyguard.”

Their sessions together are all recorded, but Bianca is still writing things down.

“Did they say when? The transcript mentions January.”

“Yes, they were discussing his schedule for the upcoming weeks.”  
  
Katya chews on her thumbnail, walking around again, her mind going a mile a minute.

“Alexei is superstitious, and dramatic. Dates matter to him. January…”

She racks her brain to come up with it, but it doesn’t come to her until the next day. She asks one of the prison guards to page agent Del Río, and she comes over in the afternoon. Katya looks like a mess, she’s been crying and her hair is standing up in all directions. Bianca is a little worried about her.

“January thirteenth. It’s their parents’ anniversary.”

“You think that’s when they wanna take out Yevgeni?”

“I do. Are there any new recordings?”

“Not yet. I’m waiting for the transcripts.”  
  


Katya groans in frustration. “We don’t need those, I can translate for you. Just… you have to hurry, Bianca,” Katya grabs the agent’s arm tight.

“Are you ok?” Bianca takes Katya’s hand off her arm and looks at her seriously. Katya laughs.

“I’m slowly going insane in here, I guess. I just…”

Katya sighs and sits down on the chair.

“I just wanna get this done and move on, you know. I know it’s gonna take forever to get them to trial, and all this time I’m in here wasting away.”

“I get it. Is there anything I can do?”

“Give me my cellphone?”

Bianca grins. “No can do, kiddo. You know that.”

“Yeah.” Katya sighs, gets up again. “I’m ok, I just need you to believe what I’m saying. And get all of their phones tapped!”

*

_Christmas_

It doesn’t matter much to the agents and police officers working Alexei’s case that the holidays are coming up. They’re working around the clock to keep up with the whole gang, nineteen men including Alexei himself, and bring Katya phone taps and other information. Bianca has stated a couple of times that they’re going out of their comfort zone, even talked to the director about how much of their classified information they are sharing with their suspect. He still told her to push on, and so she does.

“Zamo!”

Katya wakes with a shock when someone pounds a fist on her door and the little window in the door opens. It’s almost three in the afternoon, she’s been taking a nap after another session with Bianca, in which they determined that January 13th is indeed the date that Alexei has in mind. Katya cried when she heard his voice on the recording, talking to Pyotr, she cried and vomited when she got back to her cell, because she worked herself up so much.

“What?” Katya asks, getting up to look through the window, but the door opens.

“You got a little trip coming,” the guard says with a smile. She stares at him, her mind still muddy with sleep.

“A trip? I just got back.”

“Yeah. The FBI boss wants to see you. Moving up in the ranks, Zamo?”

She’s shocked and doesn’t know what to say, pulling her vest closer around her body.

“Be ready in twenty.” The guard closes the door again, and Katya looks around the room. She better put on some clean clothes when she’s going to meet Trixie’s dad.

At the FBI office, they enter through the parking garage in a car with blinded windows, and Katya is cuffed at her hands and feet when they go up in the elevator. The offices are almost empty, after all it’s Christmas Eve and most people probably got the day off or went home early. She’s lead into a meeting room, where Philip Macey waits and shakes her hand. Bianca Del Río is with him and smiles at Katya.

“Finally we meet, Katya, please sit down. Guys, can we take off the cuffs now? It’s her against two of you, right?”

“I understand we have a good chance of taking out Zamolodchikov’s entire operation, thanks to you,” Macey starts when Katya sits down without the cuffs.

Katya just stares at him, she’s trying to find Trixie’s features in his face, and sees them when he smiles. His eyes are the same soft brown and crinkle around the corners.

“I hope so, sir,” Katya answers softly. “I would like to leave it all behind me.”

The man nods. She thinks he’s probably in his late fifties, with mostly grey, thinning hair and a bit of a pouch above the belt that holds up his slacks.

They talk about the case for a moment, and he asks Katya to sign an agreement in which she legally binds herself to never talk about the evidence she’s been confronted with.

“This means we have to discuss your statements in court if you have to testify, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” Macey puts the papers back in an envelope and stands.

“Well, Katya, thanks for talking to me. I’m going to leave you now, but I have a little surprise for you. A Christmas present, maybe.”

He winks at her, and she stares at him as he leaves, and the cops and Agent Del Río also leave the room. She’s there all alone, standing at the big glass table under the glaring fluorescent lighting, when the door opens again and Trixie appears.

Katya gasps and holds a hand over her mouth while Trixie walks over to her, a little slow, careful, watching her reaction.

“Trix…”

“Hey.”

Katya takes the two steps between them and grabs her in a tight hug.

“Trixie, you’re really here,” Katya sighs.

Trixie is dressed in snow boots and a thick jacket, jeans and an ugly Christmas sweater. She drops her bag and jacket onto the floor and wraps her arms around Katya’s waist. Katya hears a little sob from where Trixie’s face is buried in her hair, and then she lets her tears go as well.

“I’m so sorry,” Trixie whispers, then loosens the hug. They sit down on two swivel chairs, as close together as they can, holding both hands.

“Don’t be, please, it’s ok. I’m ok.”  
  
“My dad said you’re helping them?”  
  
“I am. I just wish time would go faster.”

“Me too. I hope we can see each other after… all of this.”  
  
“Yes. Yes please.” Katya nods, and reaches up to pull some of Trixie’s hair away from her damp cheek.

“Your hair is longer,” Katya muses.

“Your undercut has grown out,” Trixie laughs.

“Yeah, it’s a bit of a mess,” Katya says and lifts the side of her hair to show Trixie how her own blonde is shining through where she’d dyed it black.

They sit for a while, talk about what’s going on, how Trixie has released a Christmas song as her first actual recording, and is preparing an album with nine songs to come out in the spring. They can’t get close enough, Katya’s hand rubbing over Trixie’s knee, but they both know someone is watching from somewhere, so it’s nothing more than that.

Trixie gives Katya a plastic bag, which has been checked by the officers before she came in, she states with rolling eyes. The bag is full of gifts - some clothes, chocolate, magazines and books.

“Trixie…” Katya hesitates as Trixie gets ready to leave. “Was this our first date?”

Trixie smiles, shy. “If you wanna call it that, sure.”

“Ok.” Katya winks and gives a little wave.

“Call me,” Trixie says in the doorway when she leaves.

Katya’s grin is enormous, and she can’t get it off her face even when the cops and Agent Del Río come back into the room and she’s once again cuffed around her wrists and ankles.

“Who was that?” Del Río asks between her teeth when she walks with Katya to the elevator. Katya smiles at her, and the agent has never seen her look this relaxed, or happy, or her cheeks blush like that.

“Someone special,” Katya says, and she can hear how breathy her own voice is.

Christmas is a lot less boring than Katya imagined, because of Trixie’s gifts. She’s brought Katya a pair of sporty leggings, a pair of faded blue skinny jeans that fit her like a glove, and a knitted sweater in a beautiful burgundy color, it’s big and warm and Katya never wants to take it off. There are several magazines, one is filled with crossword puzzles, and one is about fashion and celebrity gossip, but there’s one that stands out. It’s about country music, and Katya first thinks Trixie wants to educate her on her favorite music style, which she appreciates, but halfway through the magazine she sees a small picture of Trixie. It looks like it was taken by a professional photographer during a performance on a big stage, and she looks really good. There’s a little article beside it, which talks about the band and Trixie’s solo aspirations, and that she’s planning a solo album.

The next couple of days, there are no meetings with agents and Katya is alone most of the time. She puts on the leggins Trixie gave her and goes for a run on the yard of the prison when she gets her half hour outside. It’s cold, and raining lightly, but Katya just runs in circles around the small square field until she’s almost dizzy. Back in her cell, she does her routine of squats, lunges, jumping jacks and anything else she can come up with, followed by push-ups and sit-ups. She’s exhausted pretty quickly, since she hasn’t been keeping up ever since she arrived in Mexico, but she’s determined to get back in shape. If not for running from Alexei, she still wants to feel strong and look good… for Trixie.

*

_January_

Katya sits cross-legged on her metal chair, which is bolted to the floor, and listens to a recorded phone call with her eyes closed and her hands pressing the headphones against her ears. One of the people talking is outside, and it’s windy, and the other one is talking on speakerphone.

“The emperor will be at the bakery himself, but there won’t be any bread. He’s just there to talk. The man in the hat will bring a proposal, the sparrow is in the tree, and he requests black tea.”

Katya pauses the recording and looks at Bianca.

“It means Yevgeni will be there in person to meet his client, that’s the man in the hat, which means he’s not in the same business, he’s probably just a secondary dealer. Someone who doesn’t import anything and buys in smaller quantities.”

“And the sparrow? The tea?”

“Black tea is meth, the sparrow in the tree means the guy brings his own security as well.”

Bianca shakes her head. “You could be bullshitting me completely, and I’d still believe you, you know that, right?”

“It won’t do me any good if he puts a bullet in my head the minute I get out of here.”

Katya takes off the headphones and leans over the table, looking the agent square in the eye.

“Can we talk off the record for a moment?”

Bianca nods, turning off the voice recorder that’s between them on the table.

“I need you to get this motherfucker, Bianca. Don’t arrest him, kill him, and make sure he’s dead.”

“Katya…”

“If you catch him there, hell, let him shoot his brother first, you have reason enough to waste him, right?”

Bianca can see Katya is completely serious and it gives her chills. This woman has seen more than enough to know what she’s dealing with. If Bianca would bring her to the scene, she’s sure Katya would try to kill him with her bare hands. Her fear is evident in her eyes, but lately there’s been something else, too; determination. Where Katya was a little resigned before, lifeless even, she’s all fire now.

“The Bureau’s goal is to-”

“Yeah, yeah, to uphold the constitution and protect the people, I know.”

Katya puts the headphones back on and they go through the rest of the recording. It’s barely twelve hours old, they are right on track with the guys they’re following, and none of them seems to have noticed.

Time passes in a bit of a rush for Katya, with a looping schedule of working out, eating shitty prison food and talking to Bianca. Her boss even shows up to listen in on a session. He stands in the back of the room and doesn’t say anything. The next day when Katya is once again brought into their office, there are about twenty agents in a meeting room waiting for her. Her cuffs are taken off and she gets a cup of coffee, much better coffee than she ever gets at the prison.

The director stands at the front of the room and opens the meeting.

“Ladies and gentlemen, today it’s the tenth of January, and in three days, we’re going to take down an important part of the Russian mafia in our city. I want to introduce you all to Katya Zamolodchikova, she’s helped us set this up. I invited her here to make clear to all of you what we’re dealing with.”

He sits down and turns to Katya, giving her a friendly nod.

“Would you tell us a little about what to expect if we get caught up in gunfire or other forms of combat?”

“Uhm, ok…” Katya feels blood rise to her face as she looks around the table. Most people are dressed in combat gear, some are in suits. She assumes it’s a mix of FBI and police officers.

“They carry automatic weapons and shoot to kill. They will aim at your face, because they know you’re wearing vests or whatever. Their handguns probably carry RIP bullets, they will leave a huge hole where ever they hit. They will carry several guns on them, and don’t forget the knifes. If you get into hand-to-hand combat, watch out for the knifes.”

The room is silent, apart from Katya clearing her throat and taking a drink of coffee.  
  


“What can we expect on the night of the thirteenth, you think?”

Katya looks at the table as she speaks, horribly embarrassed at being put on the spot, but she wants to do this right nevertheless.

“Alexei Zamolodchikov wants to kill his brother, Yevgeni, who’s pretty much the biggest Russian criminal in the greater NY area right now. He took over from their dad. Yevgeni is close to sixty probably, but he’s very fit and never goes anywhere without his three bodyguards. They’re going to try and ambush him while he’s meeting a client at the Karenina, they always meet in the basement.”

Bianca holds up a finger to Katya, and takes over.

“We assume Alexei is going to want to pull the trigger on his brother himself, possibly taunt him a little first. The secondary goal is to mess up the deal. We haven’t identified the client yet, we believe he is high profile and a smaller dealer, distributing the drugs to a more high class clientele - celebrities, upper class. It would be a big blow to the mafia if they lose that client, not only for the income he brought, but also for their reputation.”

“We don’t know for sure if Alexei is gonna be there, that’s why I think you should watch several places at once to see when he’s moving in,” Katya adds.

Bianca and the director talk more about how they plan to move in, and then there’s a round of questions. One female police officers asks what level of violence they should expect, and Katya tells her about a time when Alexei had his men torture a snitch for three hours.

Katya can’t sleep that night, she’s too worked up and worried about ‘the bust’, as Bianca keeps calling it. Her nerves are shot to pieces after talking to such big group of law enforcement, and she’s jumpy and stressed.

Bianca comes to the prison on Sunday morning, the thirteenth, to go over the details one last time. The two men who helped her pick up Katya in Mexico are with her and all of them are dressed in combat gear. Katya is so cold, she can’t stop shaking, and she’s unfocused, and when they leave, she stops Bianca in the doorway and grabs both her biceps to hold her in place.

“Please be careful,” Katya says, her voice hushed.

“I will. It’s gonna be ok, Katya.”  
  
“Please, I just… this is weird but, I like you. I don’t want you to get killed. And I don’t want him to live.”

Bianca loosens herself from Katya’s grip and brings one hand to her face, placing it on her cheek. 

“I will do whatever I can to make sure his brains are all over the floor,” Bianca whispers. “I promise you, I will try.”

Then she takes Katya into a hug, holding her shaking body close for a short moment.

“Please call me as soon as you can, I have to know. Please,” Katya whispers.

Katya has another sleepless night, and every time she hears a siren outside, her heart skips a beat and she tries to look out of her tiny window.

At six in the morning, Katya sits on the floor, knees up against her chest, wearing Trixie’s sweater and huddling up against the heater, when there’s a loud knock on the door. She jumps up, all of her muscles coiled, but then there’s the familiar voice of the guard on the other side.

“Zamo, you up and decent?”

“Yes!”

The door opens and the female guard comes in, two of them waiting outside. She hands Katya a phone.

“Hello?”  
  
“Katya, it’s Philip Macey. We got them.”

“Oh my God,” Katya whispers and sinks to the floor on her knees.

“We got all of them, either dead or arrested. Agent Del Río asked me to let you know, they’re busy booking them now.”

“So she’s ok then.”

“She is.”

“Yevgeni and Alexei?”

“Both didn’t make it.”

A soft, keening sound leaves Katya as she curls in on herself and puts her forehead against the floor. Her body shakes with the intensity of her sobs.

“Thank you, thank you,” she whispers, then feels how the guard takes the phone from her.

Katya cries, howls almost, her body heaving and her lungs fighting for a breath. Two guards pick her up from the floor and guide her to the bed, covering her with a blanket. Someone gives her a plastic cup of water, and the rest of it is a haze.

When Katya wakes up again, she’s not sure where she is. Everything around her is white and green, and… clean? She’s not in her bunk bed, and the sheets are much softer, she sits up and groans, her head hurts and her throat is dry.

“Katya, lie down,” a soft voice says beside her, and she looks up at Bianca Del Río’s face.

“What… what’s this?”

There’s an IV in Katya’s arm.

“You’re in the medical bay, you went into shock.”

Bianca pulls the pillows up a bit so Katya can sit up. She suddenly sees that Bianca’s arm is in a sling.

“What is that? Macey said you were ok!”

“I am, I am totally ok. I just dislocated my shoulder when I tried to put cuffs on one of those guys. Those bodyguards are giants.”

“Was it you who killed him?” Katya whispers, then takes a drink of water through a straw from the bottle that Bianca holds up for her.

“Yes, that was me.”

“Fuck. I can’t believe it.” Katya lies back and closes her eyes, but opens them again quickly.

“You’re absolutely sure he’s dead?”

“One hundred percent.”

“Can I see him?”

*

Katya is taken to visit the morgue the next day, and sees Alexei’s dead body, half of him sticking out of a freezer. His skin is pale, almost translucent, his hair seems thinner and his beard is unkept. There’s a messy wound on the side of his head and he smells, but she still touches the body, pokes his face with her index finger.

The bust had a total of nineteen of Alexei’s operation, with five dead and fourteen arrests, seven Russian mafiosi from Yevgeni’s side, three dead, one on life support and three arrested, and three arrests on the client’s side. The client turned out to be a celebrity lawyer who liked to sell some drugs on the side, and he got off without a scratch on him.

While the District Attorney's office is working overtime to prepare charges for all the criminals involved, Bebe Benet pushes for a quick trial for Alexei’s widow. Katya agrees to interviews with the DA to leave testimonies on all the arrestees she knows, hoping to speed up her court date.

Katya still can’t help that she’s still in prison when Trixie releases her album, and she’s not even able to listen to it. Trixie plays her new single to her, holding her phone next to her laptop.

“I’m so fucking proud of you,” Katya coos into the phone when the song is over. Trixie’s giggle sounds better than any song every written, but Katya doesn’t say that.

“Thank you. It’s been doing well! I’ve been getting a lot of invitations to play and do interviews.”

“Ah, fuck, everybody’s going to see you.”

“Yes, is that bad?”

“Well, yes. Everybody’s going to see how beautiful you are and chase you. But I’m still waiting for my second date.”

Katya smiles into the phone, leaning against the wall beside it, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. She’s really smitten, and Trixie laughs again. Katya wishes she could see it, that and the blush on her cheeks.

“I’m waiting, too. Where are you gonna take me?”

“Me? I’m broke as fuck, you’re the famous one.”

“Ok, ok, how about I order pizza and we eat it on my couch?”

“Sounds perfect.”


	5. DALLAS, AGAIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katya goes back to Dallas on a one-way ticket, living in an appartment that the government has arranged for her. She's nervous but excited to start her new life and hopesTrixie will be a part of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END! This is the last chapter. Thanks to who ever has been reading this, I know it's something different than I've done before, and I generally don't see a lot of stories in this fandom involving crime. I have noticed there's been a lot less interest in this than my other stories, but I gave it a shot and I had fun. I hope you also enjoyed it. XO

_June_

As soon as her feet hit the pavement outside the Dallas airport, Katya starts to sweat. Where the plane and the airport were air conditioned, she’s now in the bright sunlight and high afternoon temperatures. She knows where to go, the bus stop for the express line to take her into town, even though it’s been almost a year since she was here.

The first time Katya visited Dallas, she arrived in the dark and left much too quickly, also in the dark. She wants to forget that time in her life, when everything was miserable, but at the same time she wants to hold on to it. Something really important happened during the darkest time of her life - she found a way to deal with herself and her life while spending so much time alone, and she met Trixie.

Trixie doesn’t know that Katya is in Dallas now, that she has just landed and is on her way to her new place. Trixie doesn’t even know that Katya is out of prison, although her dad might have told her about the court hearing. Everything went so fast, Katya didn’t have time to adjust or do anything, even something as simple as buying a new phone. Which is on top of her to do list, right after ‘going home’ - home being, the apartment that the Federal Relocation Programme has set her up with. The only request she had was that it was cheap and in the same area of Dallas where she stayed before.

The bus drops Katya off and she walks to street with an apartment in her name - her new name, which is in her new passport and on her new driver’s licence, and on the envelope that holds her keys.

It takes Katya a few days to get settled in at her new place, to sleep off the tiredness she’s built up over months of stress and get her healthy routine in order. She finds a gym not too far away and she’s happy to see that her attempts to work out in prison have paid off - she can almost complete her old routine of cardio and weights before the shit hit the fan and she ran from New York.

Katya buys a smartphone and it takes her a whole day to figure it out, and then she can finally call Trixie. It goes directly to voicemail, probably because it’s in the middle of the day and Trixie is busy. Katya sends a text. While she’s eating dinner, her ringtone scares her to death when it suddenly starts playing loudly.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it’s Trixie! How are you? Is this your phone? Are you out? Where are you?”  
  
Trixie is loud and enthusiastic and wants to know everything at once.

“Uhm, yeah, I… it’s Kate. Kate Buckner.”

“Wow. Can I call you Katherine?”

Katya chuckles, some of her awkwardness lifted.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t reply sooner, I was at work and it was super busy, and now I just got home and I have to get ready for a gig, it’s madness.”

“That’s ok. Where are you playing?”

“The Cherry Tree, where we met.”

Katya’s heart skips a beat when images of that bar come to mind.

“I’m in Dallas,” Katya says quickly.

“Really?” Trixie’s voice gets louder again. “Wanna come to the gig? I mean, I totally get it if you don’t wanna be… going out, or something, I just... “

“No, yes, I mean, I wanna come, what time will you be there?”

“I can go early and change there, I could be there like… seven thirty? And we can talk a little before I have to go on?”

“Ok. I’ll be there.”

“Can’t wait.”

Katya stares at the phone after they hang up, and absentmindedly finishes her dinner. What the hell is she going to wear? She touches her hair self consciously, wondering if Trixie will like it.

The dishes are abandoned in the sink and Katya spends the rest of her time trying on every item of clothing in her closet - she needs to go shopping soon. But Trixie has only seen her in the baggy sweaters and track pants she wore when she was on the run, so it can only go up from there, right?

Trixie arrives at the bar a little late, and she feels frazzled and hurried, her hair still wet from her shower, a pair of dirty jeans and a random T-shirt thrown on, not a trace of makeup on her face. She greets some patrons outside and then rushes in, looking around - did she miss her?

“Trixie.”

A blonde waves from her seat at the far end of the bar, the same spot she sat last time. Trixie does a double take at this woman - it’s Katya, but she looks completely different. Somewhere between the Katya that Trixie met last year, and the one she’d seen on the candid photos in her dad’s office. Her hair is light blonde, probably close to her natural color, and cut in a wavy bob with bangs framing her face. She’s wearing makeup, not too much, but enough eyeliner and mascara to make her eyes pop, and dark red lipstick. She’s wearing a short sleeved blouse with a green plaid pattern, buttons open, over a black tank top and tight, short jeans shorts. She looks stupidly pretty and all Trixie can do is stare while she slowly makes her way over.

“Kat… Kate,” Trixie says softly when she reaches her.

“Hey.” Katya is shy, and nervous, and she doesn’t really know what to think, but when Trixie drops her bags and opens her arms, she accepts the hug. Trixie is warm and smells fresh, and Katya can feel her chest rise with her deep inhale.

Trixie takes Katya to a tiny, messy backstage area and they sit down on an old couch that fills most of the back wall.

“How are you?” Trixie asks, turning her whole body to face Katya and sitting close enough that Katya feels heat rise to her cheeks.

“I’m good, I guess. Still a little shocked about everything, especially being outside.”

“I bet. How long were you in for?”

“About six, seven months. Well, the last few weeks I was in a safe house.”

Trixie takes one of Katya’s hands from her lap and holds it, kisses her knuckles.

“I can’t even imagine what shit you went through. I hope you feel safe now.”

“I think I do. Just a little… awkward. I don’t really know how to do life without…”

Katya doesn’t finish the sentence, but Trixie nods.

“How long are you in Dallas for?” Trixie asks, her eyes big and her teeth digging into her bottom lip.

A big smile breaks on Katya’s face. She’s still nervous, but also feels a little giddy.

“A while, I hope. I got an apartment here.”

Trixie squeezes Katya’s hand hard and bounces a little on the couch, getting even closer.

“What? You’re living here now?”  
  


“Yeah. They asked me where I wanted to relocate and I said, Dallas. I have good memories in Texas.”

Trixie leans in, close to Katya’s face, and Katya’s eyes flick to Trixie’s lips and back up, her brown eyes so close they’re almost blurry.

“Can I kiss you?” Trixie asks, and Katya nods.

The kiss is warm, and soft, and Trixie’s lips are slippery with lip balm, Katya’s sticky with lipstick, and it’s the best kiss ever. Katya’s body tingles all over and it’s warm, so warm, the back of her neck sweats and she can’t hold in a little whimper when Trixie deepens the kiss and slides their tongues together.

“Fuck,” Trixie breathes, her nose rubbing against Katya’s. “I knew it was worth the wait.” She pulls back then, and looks at Katya.

“Please tell me we’re on the same page here. I find it impossible to read you, and you’re so pretty, I get really stupid when I look at you.”

Katya giggles and looks down for a moment, then up again and her eyes take Trixie’s breath away.

“I think we are. I am… uhm, I need to… get on my feet. But I’d like to see you, and... eat pizza at your place like you promised.”

Trixie kisses Katya’s smile and she whispers little promises of extra cheese and pepperoni and silly movies and cuddling on her couch.

They sit like that for a little while longer, talking, holding hands, looking at each others faces, until Trixie has to get ready. There’s no band tonight, it’s just her, and she changes into a cute, baby blue A-line dress with matching accessories and white cowboy boots. Katya watches as she does her makeup, and stares in awe at all the layers and the amount of black and white eyeliner she uses.

When it’s time for Trixie to take the stage, Katya sits in her little corner by the bar, drinks her soda water with a slice of lemon, and watches her girl sing.

There’s a difference in Trixie’s performance now and the one Katya saw a year ago, apart from the fact that she’s playing completely alone and sings more original songs; the audience came out specifically for her. It’s a free show on a Friday night, so it’s no surprise that it’s busy, but people seem to know her. When she sings the song she played to Katya over the phone, people sing along and Trixie’s face is shining with pride. Between the songs, she tells little anecdotes and makes jokes and everybody is obviously enjoying her.

There’s a little break for Trixie halfway, and she sits with Katya after talking to some patrons. Then she plays for another hour.

“You wanna come to mine?” Trixie asks immediately when she’s done performing and takes a seat at the bar.

“Ok,” Katya answers.

Her throat is a little dry, and once again she’s nervous. She watches Trixie down a beer in just a few gulps, and it sparks the tiniest bit of jealousy that she doesn’t get to use liquid courage to steel her nerves. But she knows that if she takes that step, there’s no way she can enjoy the rest of her evening with Trixie. The alcohol is going to be the only thing on her mind once she drinks one glass, and Katya wants to be present for every second of this.

Trixie seems to be in a rush to take Katya home, and it’s so cute how she hurries to change and then pulls Katya along and out of the cafe.

“You in a hurry?” Katya asks, skipping a little to keep up with Trixie’s pace.

She looks at Katya with pink cheeks and bright eyes and smiles cheekily.

When they reach her building, Trixie calms down a little as they ride the elevator, still holding hands and staring at each other. She has waited for this moment, hoped for so long that it would happen, and now she’s a ball of nervous energy and lust.

“So yeah, this is my place.” Trixie waves her arm around, and puts her stuff away before sitting on the couch with Katya.

“It’s great,” Katya says, more to break the silence than anything else.

“Can I get you anything?” Trixie plays with a strand of her hair, which looks like a poofy mess after all the teasing and wearing a hairpiece during her performance.

Katya shakes her head and scoots closer to Trixie.

“I just want you,” she whispers as she leans in to kiss Trixie’s half open mouth.

Katya works through her nerves, the feeling of Trixie’s lips on hers too good to shy away from her. The little sighs that come from her, the warmth of her body, her hands that run over Katya’s arms restlessly all help to calm her, and her anxiety makes room for excitement.

Trixie lowers herself on the couch, pulling Katya on top, and Katya moans at the feel of Trixie’s body underneath hers. They are completely different but blend together so well, how Katya’s hips fit between Trixie’s thighs and how Trixie’s hands grab Katya’s breasts through her tank top. She pushes at the blouse, and Katya takes it off without taking her mouth away from Trixie’s.

“I missed you so bad,” Trixie whispers when Katya breaks the kiss to attach her lips to Trixie’s neck.

“Me too,” Katya breathes right into Trixie’s ear. She remembers how sensitive Trixie’s ears are and nibbles on her earlobe, making her squirm underneath her. Trixie is horny, she’s needy, Katya can feel it in her movements, the desperate impatience to touch Katya everywhere at once.

Katya slips her hand under Trixie’s shirt and scrapes her nails across the flesh of her belly, then over her side, causing goosebumps to appear on her skin. She curls her tongue around Trixie’s earlobe and sucks on it, and Trixie’s breaths come faster and faster.

“I remember what you taste like,” Katya whispers in Trixie’s ear.

“Oh, yeah? Good?”

“So good. So sweet and wet. Are you wet now?”

“Yes.” Trixie’s voice is low and hoarse and her eyes are squeezed shut while Katya’s fingers creep down and she sits on her knees to open Trixie’s jeans and shuffle them down her legs.

“Oh girl…” Katya sighs at the sight of the tiny, hot pink scrap of lace Trixie is wearing, a little darker where her juices have stained the fabric.

Katya leans down to press her face against Trixie’s covered pussy, pushing her nose against her clit, biting at her through the fabric. Trixie wrestles with her T-shirt until it’s over her head and on the floor, then unhooks her bra, and Katya moves up and over her to catch her boobs when they are freed from the constrictive fabric. There are little dents in her skin from where it’s been tight, and Katya kisses every little spot, gently massages them with her hands.

“You are so beautiful, I don’t know what I did to deserve this,” Katya says, placing a kiss between Trixie’s boobs, where her skin is damp and a hint of her perfume mixes with sweat.

Trixie runs her hands through Katya’s hair, then pulls at it to get her face up and kiss her.

“You bought me snacks,” Trixie says with a sigh, and adds, “That’s the way to my heart.”

Katya giggles and kisses her again, long and deep, her tongue slow and sensual against Trixie’s.

“Bedroom?” Katya looks up, Trixie nods.

They get rid of all their clothes, and Trixie wants to worship every muscle in Katya’s body, trailing her fingers over her rippling stomach, grabbing her ass tight as they lie side by side on her bed. It’s still warm outside, but a light breeze comes through the open window, and Katya stares into Trixie’s eyes by the glow of the little bedside lamp.

“I didn’t think I was ready,” Katya whispers, touching Trixie’s cheek. “I thought maybe I was too damaged, too fucked up to…”

“To what? If it’s too soon-”

“To fall in love.”

Trixie swallows a lump in her throat and kisses Katya hard, pushing her down to crawl on top and worship her some more. She pushes her leg between Katya’s, creating friction on her shaved pussy, her lips wet with her arousal, and rolls her hips into her. Katya grunts and grabs Trixie’s full ass cheeks in both hands. Trixie rolls Katya’s nipples between her fingers, licks and sucks on them, before sliding down over her body and parting her legs. She hooks her arms under Katya’s hips and attaches her mouth to her pussy, lapping up her wetness and pushing her tongue inside Katya while her nose teases her clit.

“Fuck, yes,” Katya moans and pants and bucks her hips against Trixie’s strong grip.

Trixie’s tongue swirls around, teasing, giving Katya barely enough to hold on to, but just enough to send her reeling. She pushes a finger inside slowly, then another, her thumb on Katya’s clit and shuffles up enough to kiss her way over Katya’s breasts up to her neck.

“I had so many fantasies about you,” Trixie whispers and bites Katya’s neck, causing her to gasp as she rolls her hips in the rhythm of Trixie’s fingers thrusting inside her.

“Tell me,” Katya pants.

“To see you again, to kiss you, to taste you.”

Trixie kisses Katya’s chin, her cheek, then her mouth.

“To fuck you,” Trixie whispers with their lips still connected, and licks Katya’s teeth and lips and pushes her tongue inside her mouth once more.

Katya is moaning louder now, her hand holding Trixie’s ass in a strong grip, keeping her body close while her fingers move in and out of Katya’s pussy faster and harder.

“Fuck, harder, make me come,” Katya mumbles incoherently, unable to keep kissing Trixie, her breathing labored and her body tight and coiled.

Trixie fucks her hard, bracing herself with her arm around Katya’s shoulder, rubbing her thumb over her clit as she starts to shiver and buck in her arms. Katya whines and pants as her orgasm takes over her body until she stills and Trixie slows her movements to a gentle caress.

Trixie covers Katya’s body with her own, feeling her chest heaving underneath her. Katya pushes at her hips to move forward.

“Sit on my face, baby,” Katya says hoarsely against Trixie’s shoulder.

Trixie places one knee on each side of Katya’s head, Katya shuffling down to face her pussy, so sweet and wet for her, so eager how Trixie lowers herself and slides over Katya’s face, making her nose wet and her mouth and then her chin. Trixie lets out a deep sigh when Katya starts to lick her, going around in circles. Trixie leans forward to put her hands against the wall behind the bed, her breasts hanging heavily above Katya.

Katya sucks on Trixie’s Iips and pokes her tongue inside shortly before putting all of her attention back on her clit, and that sensitive little spot on the side of it, remembering how crazy it made her last time.

“Fuck yes, right there,” Trixie whispers, her belly coiling. “Please, please,” she pants, not finishing her question.

Katya holds Trixie’s hips with her hands to keep her in place, her movements making it hard for her to find a rhythm, but Trixie can’t hold still, it’s too much.

“I’m gonna come, please, Katya,” Trixie mewls with her high-pitched, breathy voice.

They lie side by side on top of the sheets, their bodies spent and too sweaty to touch each other. Trixie is on her stomach, still catching her breath, Katya is pushing her fingers through her long, blonde hair, their eyes connected.

“Will you stay?” Trixie asks, her mouth a little muffled by the sheets under her face.

“If you want me to.”

Katya stays, although she barely sleeps. She wanders through Trixie’s house in the dark, drinks some water, stares out at the city street below the window, then gets back to bed.

Trixie is asleep, curled up under the thin sheet, and she looks like an angel. Katya’s heartbeat speeds up a little when she realizes that she’s completely smitten with this girl. It physically hurts to look at her, her features smooth and her hair messy around her face, her lips pursed from her cheek being squished against the pillow. Katya knows she should let Trixie sleep, that she’s probably got a busy day tomorrow, she said she’s working two jobs still, alongside all the extra performing she’s been doing since her album came out. She’s a hard working, independent woman who’s trying to make a name for herself and whose parents live on the other side of the country.

Katya doesn’t even know why Trixie lives in Texas when her parents are in New York, while they’re all actually from Wisconsin, and why Trixie is using her mother’s last name. It doesn’t really matter, Katya thinks when she scoots a little closer to Trixie, touching her hair gently with the tips of her fingers. Trixie has accepted Katya’s past, knowing what she knows, even knowing that there’s a lot she doesn’t know.

Trixie sighs in her sleep and stirs, and Katya’s body freezes, her hand hanging in the air above Trixie’s head. Trixie turns to her other side, the sheet sliding off her and exposing her naked back and ass. Katya pulls the sheet around them both and spoons Trixie’s warm body, her nose on her shoulder and her arm around her waist. Trixie wiggles a little, pressing her body closer to Katya’s.

Trixie’s hand holds Katya’s and keeps her arm around her, and Katya falls asleep with her nose in Trixie’s hair.

*

_September_

“Kat, the pizza is here! It’s starting, hurry!”

Trixie calls from the living room as Katya quickly puts on a pair of leggings and a tank top and rushes out while still drying her hair. Getting a job at the gym as a trainer means she takes a lot more showers and goes through a lot of clothes, but thankfully she can walk around in sweats all day and work out for free. It’s basically a win-win.

Trixie stands by the coffee table, opening a big pizza box and then turning up the volume on the TV, where her face is now filling the screen. She’s on stage on a statewide broadcasted talk show, lip syncing to one of her own songs because they didn’t have the option to play live with her full band.

Both girls are sitting on the edge of Katya’s couch, holding hands, almost bouncing up and down in excitement.

“You look so good, baby,” Katya says and kisses Trixie’s temple without taking her eyes off the screen.

“Thanks, it was so awkward to lip sync, but I think I did good, I just dreaded the talking part.”

Trixie is rambling and Katya wraps an arm around her. The Trixie on the screen finishes her song and accepts the applause with a bow, then puts her guitar in the stand and walks up to the host of the show and sits down with him. They talk about her album, and real life Trixie takes a slice of pizza from the box and chews nervously.

“So, Trixie, most of your songs seem to be centered around love. Is there a special someone in your life who inspires these lyrics?”

The host smiles at her encouragingly, and real life Trixie remembers how she felt when she sat in that chair. She had to make a split second decision.

“Well, Dan, I wrote these songs over a couple of years, so there are several experiences that lead to that. But there is a special person right now, yes.”

“Oh that’s wonderful, what’s his name?”

“Kate.”

Katya gasps audibly and stops chewing the bite of cheese pizza in her mouth.

“What the fuck,” she whispers.

She knows Trixie has been struggling a little with her growing fame and if, when and how she would announce to her audience that her songs are actually all about women, even though there’s one about a cowboy who broke her heart.

The host is visibly taken aback. Yeah, ok, it’s 2018, being gay is ok, but this is Texas, and Mr. Dan is probably a very Christian conservative. TV Trixie just sits pretty and smiles, and a small group in the audience starts to applaud and cheer her on, and then more people follow, and her smile turns into a grin.

“I can’t believe you said that,” Katya says and puts her pizza slice back in the box, turning to Trixie on the couch.

“I meant it. You know I mean it. I love you.”  
  


“I love you too. I’m so fucking proud of you.”

Katya kisses Trixie, and her lips are sticky and taste like pizza, and they giggle and resume dinner. When the show is over and the pizza is gone, they tidy up together and Trixie gets ready to go home. It’s just a Tuesday and she has to work tomorrow.

“Do you really have to go?” Katya whines a little when Trixie picks up her purse and steps into her shoes.

“I’m sorry, babe, I have to get up at six thirty,” Trixie whines back.

Katya stands with her back against the door, arms and legs spread.

“I can’t allow you to leave,” she says, looking serious.

Trixie’s smile is sweet and a little shy, and she puts a hand on Katya’s cheek before kissing her. Her lips are still a little pizza flavoured.

“I’m so tired,” Trixie whispers against Katya’s lips. “You know we won’t go to sleep early when I stay here.”

“We should start making out earlier, then,” Katya whispers back, letting go of the doorframe and pulling Trixie closer by her hips.

Trixie giggles and lets Katya turn them around and push her against the door, sliding her tongue between her opened lips. Her body instantly reacts, like it always does, and she can’t prevent a little moan escaping when Katya’s body traps hers.

“Move in with me,” Trixie whispers, and her eyes fly open the moment she’s said it.

Katya leans back and stares at her.

“Oh,” Trixie says. “I didn’t… I mean…”

“I don’t know…” Katya also hesitates, and Trixie wraps her arms around Katya’s neck.

“I know it’s scary for you, but I’ve thought about this. I’m so busy, I can’t see you as often as I want. If we lived together we would see each other more.”

Katya stares into Trixie’s brown eyes, they are wide and sincere.

“Trix, I’m sorry, I… I have to think about this.”

“I get that.” Trixie pushes her fingers through Katya’s hair. “I totally get it. Think about it, I don’t need an answer right now. Or at all, just know that… the option is there. My place is bigger, we can split the costs… we can sleep together every night when I’m home…”

Trixie kisses Katya so sweetly, Katya sighs and runs her hands up and down Trixie’s figure.

Commitment scares Katya, she’s still new to this whole loving relationship thing. New to being free, to not running from everything. She still looks over her shoulder a lot, still gets a scare when a police car passes her with blaring sirens - or even without any siren. She has a job now, but she makes just enough to pay all the bills, and she’s been looking for a second job, but so far no luck. Nothing seems to combine well with her hours at the gym.

“Sleep tight, baby. I’ll think about it, I promise,” Katya says when Trixie finally leaves.

*

_Christmas_

“Fuck. Fuck yes.”

It’s the morning of Christmas Eve, still a little early, and Trixie is eating Katya’s pussy on a hotel bed in New York City. She has to hold on to Katya’s strong thighs, because she keeps wanting to close them and trap Trixie’s face between them, and Trixie isn’t ready for some Onatopp trickory, because she’s sure Katya’s muscled quads are strong enough. It’s probably her own fault that Katya is squeezing her legs so much, bucking her hips into Trixie’s face, sliding her ass over the damp bed sheets, because she’s been teasing her for a while. Soft little licks around her clit, two fingers fucking her slowly, teasing her with a hard pushing motion but then backing off again.

“Baby, I need…” Katya’s voice is hoarse, she’s out of breath, she’s barely hanging on.

Trixie stops everything at once and moves up over Katya’s body, pushing her big breasts against Katya’s smaller ones.

“Tell me.”

“Oh God. You’re so cruel,” Katya whispers. “I need you to fuck me.”  
  
“Yeah? Like this?” Trixie pushes three fingers right inside Katya while watching her reaction close to her face.

“Yes, yes,” Katya’s head falls back and she rolls her hips up into Trixie’s touch. Trixie’s fingers fuck her hard, and she shimmies down Katya’s body, kissing her stomach before sucking on her clit.

Katya shudders as orgasm immediately runs through her body, taking her breath away, her fingers clawing at the sheets.

“You’re such a fucking tease, oh my God,” Katya pants when she’s calmed down and Trixie tangles their bodies together. Katya is jelly in her arms

“You know you love it,” Trixie whispers in Katya’s ear, and Katya turns to her to give her a sloppy kiss.

“You can tell by the bedsheets,” Katya says with a grin - she’s made a bit of a mess of the bed, even when she was fucking Trixie in the dark earlier, she was already dripping.

“I love you,” Trixie says, and looks into Katya’s eyes. Katya feels Trixie needs that confirmation, she needs to hear Katya say it, and that’s why she says it so often.

“Love you,” Katya says and kisses Trixie’s nose. “I have something for you, wait.”

Katya scoots off the bed, her body still a little uncooperative, her legs a little wobbly, and rummages through her bag on the desk. They got a small, cheap room for three nights to visit Trixie’s parents, feeling it would be too awkward to stay at their place. It’s small, but it’s cosy, and they don’t really need much.

Katya pulls a folded piece of paper from the depths of her bag and gives it to a puzzled looking Trixie. She sits up in the bed while Katya opens the curtains and stairs at the rainy New York morning.

“What does this mean? Kat?”

“Did you read it?”  
  
“Yeah, but… is this your lease?’

“Yes.”

Trixie stares at Katya, who is absolutely beautiful standing naked in the dull morning light, the shadows showing off her toned body.

“You cancelled your lease,” Trixie states. Katya nods.

“When?”

“February.”

“And…”  
  
“And then I’m looking for a place to live,” Katya says, and takes two steps to the bed and crawls onto it, draping herself over Trixie’s lap.

“If the offer still stands?” Katya takes Trixie’s hands in hers, the letter still between her fingers.

Trixie nods, she can’t really speak, she feels how her eyes are wet even though she hasn’t even noticed she started crying.

“Baby, don’t cry,” Katya says, alarmed, cradling Trixie in her arms.

“No, no, I’m happy, I’m sorry,” Trixie laughs and sniffs and holds Katya.

“Fuck, ok.”

“I’m just… I didn’t think… are you sure?”

Katya nods, her smile big. She’s happy with Trixie, she’s finally happy, and relaxed enough even to visit New York.

“I feel like I’m good on my feet now. You make me so happy, I can’t allow any more moments to pass between us because we’re too busy to see each other. I just… wanna be with you all the time, whenever possible.”

“Thank you,” Trixie whispers, and kisses Katya, transferring her tears onto Katya’s cheeks.

*

Christmas with the Maceys usually means bad weather, a house full of people, a tree with a hysterical amount of decorations in all colors of the rainbow, and a lot of ugly sweaters. Katya proudly wears the one Trixie gave her when she was in jail, and Trixie assured her it was perfectly ok to wear it with jeans and simple boots. Everybody turns up in casual clothes and stands around on the patio where the FBI New York Director is cooking meat on a barbecue and a fire pit is giving them some warmth.

“Mr. Macey?” Katya walks up to the tall man, grinning at his sweater with a snowman and actual Christmas ornaments fastened to the knit fabric with safety pins.

“Kate, hi.” He gives her a one-armed hug, tongs still in his other hand.

“Smells good.”  
  
“Thank you, well, you’d have to give my wife all the credits for that. I just do the easy part.”

Katya nods and smiles politely. She feels a little awkward, seeing this man again. The last time she did, they were busy setting up the bust of her ex husband’s criminal organisation and she was looking at serious charges. On the other hand, he’s been a big help in making sure she was safe and got out without doing any more time.

“You’ve been doing well? Do you like Dallas?”

“Yeah, it’s great. I had to get used to my new life, but it’s been good.”

Katya bites her lip and looks down at her shoes for a moment.

“I just, uh…”

Macey closes the lid on the barbecue and turns to her, hands in his jeans pockets, very relaxed and casual.

“I just hope you’re ok with… me and Trixie. I mean… it must be a little weird for you, and, well, I’m very aware of my past, but I really love her.”

Katya feels her face is warm, and probably bright red, and she opens the zipper on her jacket. Macey puts a hand on her shoulder and squeezes it, and he smiles at her.

“It’s been an adjustment, I will admit that, Katya. But I know you love her, and she’s absolutely crazy about you. I know my daughter, and I trust her judgement.”

“Ok.”

Katya is relieved at his words, and feels the tension leaving her body.

The girls celebrate the evening with Trixie’s parents, her brothers and their families, her grandmother, and the old neighbor from across the street who has lost his wife years ago and has been coming to the Maceys every Christmas. The family enjoys the food and each other’s company, handing out presents, drinking wine and eating the barbecued meat with vegetables and potato casserole that Trixie’s mother has all cooked to perfection.

Katya feels warm and happy, even if she’s the only one not drinking, even if she doesn’t understand the inside jokes and has never understood the meaning of the American Christmas tradition. She’s happy to hold Trixie’s hand under the tablecloth, and to call these people her family, swapping phone numbers with Trixie’s sister in law who wants some training tips, and watching the kids enjoy the cowboy hats they’ve brought from Dallas.

Trixie’s heart is full when she looks at Katya interacting with her family. She didn’t expect anything from the shy girl at the bar, the one with the piercing blue eyes, the one who turned out to be the love of her life. She just trusted her instincts, and she’s glad she did.

 


End file.
